I sat there for a second watching closely as Shiori ordered her coffee, then sat at the table behind us. Of course, I'm curious to get one more look at her, like, honestly, if you were in my situation, you wouldn't? Don't lie!

  And before you think it, I'm not a perv, just a curious child, okay, leave the 'what a perv' comments to yourself. I looked over my shoulder, where now Shiori was sitting, and well, like she had some sixth sense, she was already staring at me.

  "Hey, sir, leaving already?" The barista called out. Because without any hesitation, I turned around, drank my coffee in one gulp and left.

  "There was no way I was staying in there," I said to myself, walking outside the coffee shop. But just as I stepped off the little porch, I heard them.

  Reina’s soft voice.

  Nao’s chaotic energy.

  Arisa’s ever-teasing tone.

  Yuki’s quiet, judging silence.

  They were coming down the path, all four of them, heading my way. And judging by their faces, they hadn’t cooled down from the earlier announcement either. I gulped, feeling like the coffee was going to come back out again.

  “Alright. Time to go back to pretending I’m not the main character of a romantic warzone. Let’s see how long I survive.”

  As soon as we locked eyes, Nao was the first to break formation.

  “OHHH SOUTA! THERE YOU ARE, YOU SILLY GOOSE!” She shouted, jogging over like she hadn’t just ditched me thirty minutes ago.

  “…Uhh, you guys left me, remember?” I muttered.

  Nao tilted her head like a confused puppy, then glanced back at the girls, then back at me.

  “Oh yeah. Hehe~ Oops!”

  I’m gonna say something controversial. Hate me if you want, but if Nao wasn’t so damn cute, and also if I wasn’t contractually bound to be her maid, I would’ve punted her like a football. But alas, I took the high road and composed myself.

  "Haha, yep, just an oops," I murmured, feeling my brow twitch uncontrollably.

  Reina and Arisa strolled up next.

  “Heyyy Souta,” Arisa said, resting her face on her palm like she was in a shoujo manga. “Did you miss us? Surprised you didn’t come running after us. I thought you were our little guard dog.”

  I sighed, already tired. “Nope. This time, I knew you had each other, and I figured leaving four of you alone wouldn’t end in a total disaster.”

  That’s when Yuki chimed in, arms crossed and tone ice cold. “Listen. If anything had happened, you’d be the one face-down in a ditch. We’d be just fine without your overprotective dad mode.”

  No eye contact. Just verbal stab wounds.

  “Right. Yeah. My bad,” I mumbled.

  Then Nao perked up like she’d just remembered something. “Oh yeah! We decided, we’re gonna help you out!”

  "Huh?"

  My mind went straight to a fantasy of being granted paid time off, maybe a back massage, a break from the chaos.

  “Please be a vacation. Please be paid leave. Please let Wilhelm have adopted me out of this hell-”

  This narrative has been purloined without the author's approval. Report any appearances on Amazon.

  “We’re gonna audition to be the Princess!” Nao beamed.

  My face contorted.

  What?

  Didn’t they all just argue for hours about how they didn’t want to kiss me? And now we were flipping the script?

  Typical. Absolutely typical.

  Well, Nao might have had a happy face, but I looked at the rest of them, even Arisa, who was kind of blushing as Nao's words echoed into the open air. “Well… Uh, that’s great and all, but I think there’s already someone who applied,” I said, half-hoping they wouldn’t ask.

  They did.

  All four heads turned toward me, eyes wide like they'd just spotted a rat in the food court.

  “WHO?!” They said in horrifying unison.

  I flinched so hard my soul almost left my body.

  “Uh…. Ummmm. I… I think her name was… Uh… Shiota? Shirota? Shakira?”

  “It’s Shiori.” A voice called out, with defiance.

  The café bell chimed.

  All of us turned.

  Standing there like she was in her own dramatic anime entrance was Shiori herself, dark hair swaying slightly from the breeze, glasses glinting under the light, her arms crossed with commanding elegance.

  She didn’t smile. She didn’t blink.

  She simply stepped forward.

  “It’s Shiori,” she said, voice crisp. “And I will be the Princess.”

  We stood frozen.

  She continued, gaze locked directly on me like a hawk spotting prey.

  “Don’t get the wrong idea. I have no feelings for you. This is not about romance. This is about achievement. I will become the greatest actress this world has ever seen. This play? It is merely step one.”

  She had the voice of a noblewoman in a war council. Somehow, it was also kind of hot. Arisa blinked. “W-Wait, hold on… What about the kissing scene? You’re seriously okay with kissing him?”

  Shiori raised an eyebrow. “A kissing scene won’t derail me. If it’s required, so be it. I’ll kiss a cactus if I must, don't lump me in with such childish things in the acting world, kissing is just another part of the job.”

  Then for a brief moment there was silence...

  "..."

  "..."

  Then, out of nowhere, she raised her finger and pointed at me like I was some criminal walking among the people.

  “But! You will have a mint. I refuse to let mediocre breath sabotage my career.”

  Her words echoed through the air like gunfire.

  Even more silence.

  Even the cicadas stopped chirping.

  "Could have said please at least… And my breath…" I murmured, checking the smell. "It's not that bad…"

  Shiori blinked. I could tell she felt kind of bad, but instead of saying sorry, she coughed, realising no one else had replied, and tried to smooth her skirt with mock dignity.

  “…A-Anyway, it’s pointless for any of you to audition. I’ve already won. Save yourselves the embarrassment.” With that, she turned and left, as if she’d just dropped a nuke.

  The girls stared in slack-jawed horror.

  Yuki muttered under her breath. “There’s… Actually, a crazy girl willing to kiss Souta? For acting?”

  Fair criticism.

  “Welp,” I said, clapping my hands. “There we go! No need to embarrass yourselves, ladies. Crisis averted.”

  I laughed, but I couldn't hide my nervousness.

  But inside?

  I was genuinely terrified.

  Sure, Shiori was gorgeous, but that intensity?

  That ambition?

  That laser focus?

  It was giving Yuki energy. And I wasn’t ready for a second Yuki.

  The café door swung closed behind Shiori with a dramatic clink, like the end of a boss battle cutscene. No one moved. No one said a word. As we watched her walk away.

  Then.

  “…Did she just call your breath ‘shitty’?” Reina blinked at me like that was the most concerning thing.

  “That’s what you’re focusing on!?” I choked.

  “Just saying,” Reina shrugged. “You do chew gum like it’s medicine.”

  Arisa slammed her hands on the nearby table, shaking the sugar packets.

  “Okay. That’s it. Gloves are off.” She turned to the group, fire in her eyes.

  “We fight her.”

  “…What?” Yuki said flatly. "Arisa, last time I checked, you can't throw a punch to save your life." She said blankly.

  “TRUE, but this is a 4 versus 1! Strength in numbers. We rush her, steal her glasses, tie her up with a microphone wire, and then one of us takes the princess role while she’s stuck in the janitor's closet.”

  Yuki rolled her eyes so hard they almost exited her skull. “You're not fighting her, you maniac.”

  “But she’s scary! We can't let her kiss him!” Arisa replied, stamping the ground.

  Reina, unusually vocal, added in a murmur, “She was kind of... Intense.”

  “I think she’s a robot,” Nao whispered dramatically.

  “She’s not a robot,” Yuki snapped, rubbing her temple. “She’s just... Ambitious. And dramatic. Like you but less dumb.”

  “Thank you,” Nao said. “Wait. Hey!”

  Yuki straightened up, arms still folded. “Look, I’m not auditioning. That was never my plan. But I’m also not gonna let some outside girl steal the spotlight and put her lips on our maid.”

  Arisa perked up. “Wait, ‘our’ maid?”

  Reina tilted her head. “Does this mean you want one of us to play the Princess?”

  Yuki looked away, but her ears went a little red. “Tch. It’s logical. If anyone has to do it, better it be someone we know, like you, Nao or Reina. Who won’t… Make it weird.”

  "But it would become weird if you guys… Just forget it." I opened my mouth but stopped, knowing they wouldn't even listen.

  Nao stood on the plastic chair like a war general.

  “Alright, troops, new mission! Beat the scary actress girl, win the princess role, keep the kiss in the family!”

  “That phrasing…” I whispered, horrified.

  “FOR SOUTA!” Nao shouted.

  “FOR DIGNITY!” Arisa echoed.

  “For… Not letting strangers kiss people they don't like,” Reina mumbled.

  Yuki stayed quiet for a moment, then finally muttered:

  “…Just make sure you brush your teeth before rehearsal.”

  I didn’t know what was worse, that they were actually forming a defensive unit... Or that Shiori had just become their common enemy.

  And I?

  I was on the battlefield... Also, somehow the prize?

  Thank you for reading.

  DeadEndYuto!