When I returned from my walk, Sybil was standing to the side of a circle that she had drawn on the ground, and holding a sturdy looking stick with rounded ends.

  As I approached her, she held out the stick for me to take.

  "Soph, this lesson is an easy one. You're going to poke Ruben with this stick."

  "Ah, Sybil did say somethin' about helping you with your practice. Guess that's today, then?"

  He cracked his neck and stood in the center of the circle, holding his arms to either side in a confident shrug.

  "C'mon then."

  I stood at the edge of the circle, looking to Sybil and back to Ruben.

  "I just... poke you with the stick?" I asked, stepping into the circle.

  Ruben lunged forward, and I stepped back on reflex, out of the practice area.

  He and Sybil both laughed.

  "I didn't say he'd let you, Soph!"

  "It's a good response though, twig. Better to back off than commit to somethin' you're not prepared for."

  "Does this even constitute training? What kind of form should I take? What steps should I use?"

  Sybil laughed.

  "Soph, we've been practicing how to threaten the line this whole time. All you have to do is make use of it."

  I wheeled on Sybil, gesturing at her with the stick, "You've taught me to keep my dagger pointed at their face or heart! Won't that hurt?"

  Ruben scoffed. "Well, you really think you'll get that far?"

  ---

  Breakfast was ready by the time Sybil called the practice over, and my arms were aching.

  I was muddy from what felt like an hour of drills, half of them ending with me being taken to the ground and the other half with me retreating before I barely had a chance to try to get at Ruben with the stick.

  I hadn't even come close to tagging him with it.

  "I guess I should have been more suspicious when Sybil taught me how to take a fall, yesterday..."

  "You did good, kid. By the end, you were more frustrated than scared, even with a big hairy guy like me in your face. By the end, you were really trying to hit me. I could see it in your eyes."

  Ruben handed me a wet towel, warmed by the fire, to wipe my face off with.

  "They were good eyes."

  I accepted the towel, but looked up at him before using it.

  "Wait, was that the whole point?"

  "No, not the whole point. You've started puttin' your footwork into somethin' sensible, and I bet your arms are feelin' the burn from all that exercise."

  He looked at me askance, "You feelin' hungry?"

  "Ravenous, Ruben. And thanks, I feel a bit better now that I know I wasn't just being tormented for the fun of it."

  "Oh, don't get me wrong Soph, the fun is also the point."

  He grinned, and I yelped when he clapped me on the shoulder while I had my face full of towel.

  "I bet you're getting a present from Sybil, soon. This is something of a tradition she learned from her mother."

  ---

  I could see the anguish in Erika's face when she saw my muddy hair.

  "Good thing I'm still wearing a practice uniform, or else I think she might have had a fit."

  I had grown more and more accustomed to the shirt and pants that Sybil had lent me, and to the soft leather boots she had bought me.

  It felt good.

  Breakfast was mostly meat, as per usual. Sybil had insisted, and lately, I was more than willing to oblige her.

  I stuffed my sausages into my bread before eating it all together, like I used to do when I was a child.

  Sybil, Ruben, and Tor all laughed, but I knew they meant it well. Here, I didn't have to worry about manners. Their only concern was that I was fed.

  Erika nagged as she moved a bucket of water over to me to start picking through my hair, but I could tell from the timbre of her voice that she was also happy.

  Sybil joined her, taking out a small tin of oil, and braiding my hair tight.

  I wished these days would never end.

  ---

  Sybil had grown extremely quiet.

  The road had not been kind to us. We had had to make a severe detour due to the collapse of a bridge, and because of that, our journey had taken us far from the river and up a series of ridges.

  With every day, I had felt the temperature dropping, and seen more and more patches of unmelted snow.

  And on this day, I noticed that our water had frozen overnight. The cold had drained the enthusiasm out of everyone, and I had begun to grow nervous that they were hiding things from me.

  "It's about time for us to make camp. Eri, why don't you get us started?"

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  Erika gave a sheepish smile as she opened the door to signal Tor to stop the carriage, stepping out to the ground as soon as it was safe to do so.

  Sybil closed the door behind her, remaining in the carriage with me.

  "Is everything alright, Sybil?"

  "It's... Yes, Soph. More than alright. Sorry, I'm no good at this sort of thing."

  My heart started pounding. "No good at what sort of thing?"

  She scratched at the back of her head awkwardly.

  "It's your and Eri's birthday, today, isn't it?"

  I put my finger to my cheek, heart still pounding.

  "Y..yes?"

  "I'm eighteen, then. I'd forgotten, with all the travel."

  She reached into Erika's satchel to pull out a long, thin dagger in a jet black scabbard. It had a much smaller crossguard than usual, but a familiar insignia on the pommel.

  A bird, carrying a ribbon. The text was too small to read.

  "In love, loss. In life, death," Sybil whispered as she carefully presented it to me.

  I reached out to pick it up, but she clutched it back to herself sheepishly.

  "No, wait. I should explain..."

  She took a deep breath, and slowly exhaled.

  "You're my first apprentice, Soph. I know that it's not going to be for long, but it still means a lot to me."

  "The Nightingales have a tradition where your master gives you your first blade..."

  "Ahh, I'm explaining this all backwards."

  She pressed her hand to her forehead and took another few breaths in silence.

  "You, uh, you said you'd love to be my apprentice, and I just thought..."

  "But, this is, sortof a bigger deal for me than it'd be for most, 'cause... My mother... ahh... damn it."

  She finally thrust her hand out for me to take the dagger.

  "Just take it already, and get Eri to teach you how to tie the scabbard into your dress so you can hide it."

  I couldn't see clearly, but somehow I knew that as she left the carriage she was blushing with embarrassment.

  ---

  After taking some time to compose myself, I exited the carriage to see that Sybil had taken on her usual demeanor, and was helping Erika set up the camp for the night.

  Tor was standing next to the carriage door, and he reached out to put a hand on my shoulder.

  "Was wonderin' if she'd ever get to tha'. She migh' 'ave tol' ye already, bu' in Corone, kids aren' usually raised by their parents."

  He was grinning wide as he helped me down the steps to the ground.

  "The person they call 'mother' or 'father' is the one tha' takes them in as apprentice, when they're still young. This was a big deal fer her. I'm glad ye accepted it."

  As I gripped the dagger tight to my chest, I felt an ache in my heart.

  "She's no replacement for mom. But I know she's not trying to be. She's just... Sybil."

  "Is this really okay, Tor? What if she regrets it?"

  "When was the las' time ye saw a smithy, m'lady?"

  I turned to look back down the ridge, back towards Guldenfel.

  "She's given it the proper thought. All ye 'ave to do is accept it."

  Along with the ache, I felt a growing warmth.

  ---

  As I joined the circle around that night's campfire, Erika and Sybil were discussing the usual logistics.

  Although, Sybil kept glancing at the dagger I was holding, and smiled a bit more than usual.

  "Eri, we might need to start rationing a bit tighter. It's already been two weeks, and we're not even halfway there. The road is only going to get worse from here on out."

  Erika's face scrunched this way and that as she thought to herself.

  "How many days would we last on our current rations?"

  "Thirteen, give or take. We planned for an extra week, but we've already gone through that."

  "I could always try using my magic to eat less..."

  Erika and Sybil both turned to me, shaking their heads in unison as Sybil barked out a firm "No."

  I rested my chin on my hands and looked into the fire.

  "Then, what if Tor, Ruben, and I start taking half rations," Erika continued, "since we aren't taking part in your training consistently?"

  Sybil picked up a stick to start doing some figuring in the dirt.

  "About eighteen," I blurted out, still looking into the fire.

  The group turned to look at me, eyes furrowed or wide in varying flavors of surprise.

  "Thirteen days, times five people, times two half rations, which makes an easy one-thirty since that's ten, then divided by the seven half rations we'll be eating."

  "A seventh of a hundred is a little over fourteen, and a seventh of thirty is a little over four, so that's about eighteen."

  Erika was quickly tipping her fingers as she followed along with the math, muttering quietly to herself as she followed my explanation.

  "What?" I asked, growing embarrassed.

  "Sophie's right. A little over eighteen."

  "Hah! I didn't know my apprentice had an eye for numbers!"

  I buried my head in my arms.

  "I... went to school, you know!"

  ---

  Sybil had to call off our lessons a mere twelve days later, as she also began taking half rations.

  "You know enough to be dangerous with that dagger, Soph. From here on out, I can only pray that you don't ever have reason to use it."

  She made her warding sign again, this time ending it by touching two fingers to my forehead.

  Her face was hard, and I knew from the whispered conversations that everyone was having around me that things still weren't going to plan.

  They all still refused to let me join them in rationing. The first day that I had tried to use my magic to replace food, they'd forced me to eat anyways.

  There had been talk of hunting, but prey was thin this time of year.

  "Even the wolves are going hungry about right now, Soph."

  But that didn't make me feel any better.

  ---

  On the last day of rationing, Sybil covered my eyes and held my face to her chest as I cried.

  With a swift cut, the pretty black horse made no more noise.

  I heard Erika begin taking him apart, directing Ruben and Tor as they unloaded the essentials from the cart it had once pulled to pack into the carriage.

  Dresses and luxuries were tossed onto the side of the road, for whoever came after to find.

  Our only cargo would be my marriage chest, and horse meat wrapped in a jet black canvas.

  ---

  As we crested the final ridge of our journey, the Hiems estate came into view.

  A cold, gray castle, adorned with white and deep blue heraldry. A field of nothing but snow, and a tall stone wall that guarded a mountain pass.

  Small houses and huts dotted the field, smoke rising from their chimneys, and a great stone bridge crossed the final gap between us and our destination.

  I held my hand to my heart, clutching at it through my shirt.

  I could only hope that all of this had been worth it.

  "Across this bridge is either Diana, or the last place I'll have to escape from."

  If she wasn't here, I would leave with the Nightingales. With Erika.

  "And we'll figure the rest out as we go. One step at a time."