What in the ever loving fuck was I meant to do after an encounter with the divine? Keep living my life like it was normal to attract a god’s attention? The gods aren’t so reclusive as to deny their presence to mere mortals, but the thought of being made a witness wasn’t something that I had the gall to even consider. Perhaps I should’ve felt some hint of pride to have been seen by something so far beyond me? Like an ant being acknowledged by the boot rather than crushed.

  But attention wasn’t always a good thing, especially not when caught in the gaze of an ontological titan.

  He didn’t know who I was, seemingly not in possession of the omnipotence implied by something of divinity. But he could see what rested in my soul, without even a hint of invasion to defend against. That…was terrifying. Especially considering that I’d gotten quite a bit stronger since meeting Arr’koro.

  I shouldn't've been surprised that gods worked on a different scale, but to be frank, the possibility that my dumbass would get to be in the presence of a god wasn’t exactly floating around my mind.

  Adaman wasn’t the slightest bit fazed when I woke up, just giving me a few pats on the back as the beginnings of a panic attack overtook my biology.

  “My patron can be quite intimidating can’t they?” He laughed. “Say, did you get the corpse fields?”

  I had just enough presence of mind to nod before the rest of his words became a slurry of nonsense fermenting in the background as the world began to close in on itself. Everything that I was becoming a singular that meant nothing in the face of so much-

  Square breathing, square breathing.

  I left the temple. A two pointed star hanging from a freshly pierced ear, feeling just about ready to lay on my bed and weather the coming existential crisis in the land of dreams. That shit was for pussies though, so I went to the sewers instead.

  Alvir said I could kill his precious giant rats, and I hadn’t taken him up on the offer just yet for cautions sake, but I felt that violence would be a fantastic distraction from all the thoughts swirling in my mind.

  I was right of course, and soon after I walked proudly through the guild hall to deposit one rodent's head. The guild didn’t seem all that surprised since it was my third Muri-Ursi by this point. Though the man at the counter seemed a little incredulous at me having brought just the head.

  “You realize that if you were willing to split the coin and hired a few fools, you’d be raking in more than what just the brain could give ya?” he said.

  I shrugged, but didn’t deign to give the man a response. He let out a snort then handed me my silver. More than I was used to but the hunts had been dry since the coming of winter, few were willing to brave the snow and risk an encounter with the things that arose to the call of the season.

  Loklan and his group was one of those few, but he wasn’t at all willing to take me and Xae along, so I was stuck in the city with just butchering and training to fill my time.

  I left the guild attendant and headed for the butchers table to continue my intrepid attempt at avoiding my inevitable confrontation with my thoughts. It worked well enough, I got to disassemble a few monsters that were done bleeding at the behest of the head butcher.

  The woman seemed to like me if her preferential treatment was any sign, though that might’ve been because of the magister's son that usually came along.

  It was late, so he wasn’t there this time, and…I kinda missed the idiot. His passion for the butchers table was refreshing.

  “What’s gotten stuck in your noggin’, young’un?” A familiar voice interrupted the blessed monotony of skinning a scale wolf. I turned to see the head butcher giving me a raised brow.

  I returned the gesture. “What makes you think I’m thinking anything at all?”

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  She let out a snort. “Funny, yous might be the biggest thinker for yer age that my mind can conjure,” she said. “Now let’s not play games, If ya don’t want me to pry you could just say so.”

  I pursed my lips and let out a sigh. “Sorry it’s just…personal.”

  “Got something to do with the new shiny thing hanging from your ear?”

  I glared at her and she raised her hands in surrender. “Alright your magicness, I’ll leave it alone.”

  I grumbled at the nickname, the fact I was something of a mage was starting to become an open secret amongst the guild. Plenty were excited that another mage was in their midst considering the only ones were either Healer Ken or out exploring the world. Acting more like an adventurer than hunter. I continued my glare and the butcher let out a chuckle at my indignation. I shrugged and grumbled, getting back to the butchering before I’d have to head to my inn and face the nightmares.

  A week went by with little to nothing besides either butchering or training.

  Monotony was the blessing that soothed my soul as most of the hunters settled in for winter. There were piles of monster corpses that still had months before they’d begin to decay, they’d have to last through the winter to feed the guilds customers. It became a paradoxically good time to buy a monster’s givings since most of the game meat dried up not long after winter's advent.

  Few were willing to risk an encounter with a wendigo or some other denizen of the cold, so most relied on their savings to make it through the season.

  Eventually the cold reached an intensity where I felt it wouldn’t be seen as charity to offer my friends a place to sleep. They were skeptical of my excuses advocating for the idea, not quite believing that I would seek their warmth for comfort. I wasn’t lying though, I was just in search of a more metaphorical kind of warmth.

  Sleeping alone in the cold was a first and I…found it rather unpleasant.

  “It isn’t even that cold in here,” Gar raised a brow as he entered the room.

  Riri gave a nod in support of his observation. “Only a bit chilly.”

  “I was a blacksmith's daughter,” I grumbled. “I’m used to much warmer conditions.”

  Again, not entirely a lie.

  The glance they gave each other was telling in their skepticism. “Sure,” they both said diplomatically.

  So we shared the room for the foreseeable future, which the innkeeper luckily didn’t mind. Not enough to charge extra at least. It was a poor substitute for what I’d lost but it was better than nothing. I’d take what I could get at that point.

  Besides, having them so close meant we’d have more time to prepare for the coming venture through the sewers. I just needed to get them proper blades and they’d be ready. Something I was stalling on because…well, all the ones I could afford seemed to have some sort of glaring flaw. Either shit balancing or poor beveling. I wasn’t about to send them down to the sewers with a sub-par weapon.

  I might’ve had a burgeoning trust for Alvir, but his rats didn’t exactly show mercy when I fought them, and I needed them to be safe. This was all just so they could land an apprenticeship…and prepare them for the end but that’s a more long term goal.

  Speaking of Alvir, since hunting went on the backburner, I was spending more time having him teach me the ways of mana sensing. As well as being the jewelers mascot. He was his jovial self as usual, which I was starting to think wasn’t entirely a mask.

  The witch was odd.

  But so was I from an outside perspective with my obsession for training so I tried not to judge. I was failing, but the effort had to mean something!

  “So?” Alvir said.

  I pursed my lips. “It’s…barely there to my senses. I can tell that something is different but not what. Like a passing breeze but for my spirit? If that makes sense.”

  “Makes enough sense.” He shrugged. “It’s still a significant amount of mana, but the fact you can sense it is a good sign. Means we’re progressing faster than I thought we would! Soon we might start getting you attuned to the other wonderful oddities of the world.”

  “Such as?”

  He gave me a villainous smile. “Where’s the fun in telling you? Train yourself up some more and then we can talk about all the other lovely things out there. Or we could try something a little…extreme?” His smile widened with that last statement.

  “Nope,” I shot down instantly.

  “Oh come on! You didn’t even give an ear to what I was going to say.”

  “Anything that would put that expression on your face isn’t worth considering.” I snorted. “Sometimes I forget you’re a big evil witch.”

  “You wound me!” he said.

  “Sure, sure. Now let’s get back to training, I’ve been indulging your humor for too long as it is.”

  “Kids these days,” he grumbled. “No respect. Whatever, I have a few more things I need to enchant anyway.”

  I nodded and we continued the training.