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Drinking like a Sailor

  Just great, I lost the map.

  My only resource to navigate this building is gone. My phone died while I was setting up cameras in the bowling alley, which was a while ago, so I can't call for backup. Guess I'm going to just sleep on the floor. I wish I had worn a watch because I don't even know what time of day it is. Wait, what if no one finds me for days? I would probably die of dehydration first.

  Now I really have to find my way to a charger or a map of the building. I heard that when you die, everything in your lower bowels gets released. I can't let Bennet find me like that. He'd be so annoyed.

  I picked up the pace, moving quickly through hall after hall. I have to send my regards to the interior decorator because each wall had a different painting on it, which meant no two hallways were the same, giving me hope I could navigate this maze. At the end of the hallway was a painting of a dog riding a tricycle where the hall split into two directions.

  For a moment I stood in front of the dog. Maybe I should listen to see if I can hear anyone talking, or maybe the sound of a TV. At first there was only silence, but then I started to hear music coming from down the hallway. Without hesitation, I ran towards the sound of salvation.

  As I approached the room, the music grew louder and louder until finally I reached the open doorway of the bar.

  Rue was behind the bar, mixing drinks in a grey tin. There were two ice chests next to her as she mixed the drinks. She was now wearing an oversized shirt that was half tucked into her shorts. She was the first to notice me at the doorway. "Oh, hey there Tommy boy! You ready to party?!"

  Ania, sitting at the bar, slowly swiveled around to look at me. Her glasses were drooped lower down on her nose and her cheeks were flushed. "Come on, computer boy, take a seat and relax. You've worked hard today," Ania said, patting the stool next to her.

  Zofia was in the middle of the room, dancing and twirling to classical music with a can of White Claw in her hand. "They're right, Tom! Life is about balance. First you work and then you relax. It's the natural order of the universe," Zofia sang, or at least she tried. It was hard to understand her when her speech was so slurred.

  I was hoping to find Bennet and go to bed. But beggars can't be choosers.

  Walking over to the bar, I sat next to Ania. Rue put the tin down, then grabbed the cup in front of Ania. She opened the chest to her right and added a fresh batch of ice into the empty cup. Then, grabbing the tin, she poured its contents into the glass. A pink liquid flowed over the ice, filling the glass. Rue then topped the now filled glass with a cherry and pushed it forward back to Ania.

  "A pink lady for one lovely lady," Rue said. Using a towel, she wiped her hands and turned to me. "Now what can I get 'cha, partner?"

  "I'll just have water. Wait, you said that's a pink lady? I've never seen it made with ice before," I said, pointing to the drink.

  "Yeah, that's just Ania. She can't drink anything without ice," Rue said, adding ice to my glass. This time she used the left ice bucket. Reaching below her, she grabbed a water bottle and poured its contents into the glass.

  "It's just weird looking at the flat surface of a drink, you know. It's almost as if it's a portal to another dimension," Ania said, staring into her drink. "You need the ice to break the portal, otherwise you'll be sucked in."

  I grabbed the water Rue handed me. "That's...uh...pretty deep," I said, taking a sip from the glass of water.

  "You know what else is deep? How deep in love Rue was with the mystery man," Zofia said, plopping down in a chair, breathing heavily and laughing hysterically.

  "Shut up, Zofia," Rue said, throwing an ice cube at Zofia. It hit her right in the arm as she continued to laugh.

  "Ah, I also found the love of my life, but for various reasons we were separated for quite some time. We were eventually reunited and I realized all over again why I fell in love in the first place," I said, moving my finger around the rim of my cup.

  "Aww, tell us all about them, Tom," Rue said, putting her elbows on the counter and her chin in her hands.

  "Its swirl was magnificent. They wound together into the center and oozed sticky perfection. It was nice and round in all the right places. Spread across its top was a gooey, delicious peanut butter spread that dripped along its side. Then when it was paired next to two scoops of silky-smooth vanilla bean ice cream, it made for the ultimate midnight snack," I said, then took another sip. When I looked up, I saw Zofia sleeping in the chair, while Ania and Rue were staring at me with eyebrows raised.

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  "Are you talking about a cinnamon bun?" Rue started to chuckle.

  Ania was the first to break the silence as she giggled. "With that description, you must really love cinnamon buns."

  "They're God's gift to humanity," I said, finishing the glass of water. I slid the cup back to Rue, and she refilled my drink.

  "At least you know your lover. I don't even know my lover's name. We met at my mom's funeral," Rue said, taking a shot of a dark brown liquid. "I was watching the service in the back of the room near the exit. As everyone was giving their speeches about mom, I was taking a swig from the flask I snuck in. I really wasn't taking it very well. I know you're supposed to outlive your parents, but I didn't think she would go that way and so soon at that." Rue wiped a tear out of her eye.

  Rue grabbed a water bottle from underneath the counter, took a long sip, then continued her story. "I stepped outside for a quick smoke, just to relieve some stress, you know. That's when I met him. He was standing there with a cigarette in his mouth, underneath an umbrella to keep himself dry in the rain. I asked him for a light, which he gave me, and then he let me stand next to him under the umbrella. As I stood there, he smelled of oak and musk. It was intoxicating."

  "He was honestly so amazing, and as he talked more and more, I wanted to know about him." Rue was now using her finger to circle the bottle cap. She had almost a childlike smile across her face as she talked about all the things they discussed. But it slowly started to sour. "Eventually the church let out and Zofia pulled me aside to ask if I could drive her to the repast. I told her to give me a moment. But when I turned around, the amazing guy had disappeared."

  "I still can't believe it never occurred to you to get his name," Ania said, wiping the condensation off her cup with a finger. She stared at the water droplet on her finger.

  "I know, big sister. I feel like such an idiot. Some days I just tell myself that he was an angel that came down to help me in my time of need," Rue said, staring longingly into the distance.

  "Okay, I think it's time for me to go to bed. It feels like you're about to go on and on about this mystery guy, and I don't feel like listening to it tonight," Ania said. She stumbled out of her seat, looking as if the very attempt to stand up straight made her dizzy. Drool fell from the corner of her mouth. "Oops, I'm sorry." As she wiped the drool from her mouth, I noticed that her cheeks were much redder than they had been earlier.

  I stood up and offered my arm to help prop her up so she could walk. "Let's make a deal. I'll help take you to your room, and in return you can take me to mine," I said.

  "You're such a gentleman, Tom. The guest room is in the same hallway, so I'll take you to where you'll be sleeping," Ania said, grabbing her glass. We walked towards the entrance, said goodbye to Rue, who was taking another shot of the brown liquid, and to a sleeping Zofia in the armchair, then ventured back into the maze.

  It amazed me that Ania could navigate the hallways so effortlessly on top of being stumbling drunk. As we continued to walk, Ania continued to drool from her mouth and her slurred speech worsened by the minute. If her arm wasn't tucked between mine, she'd have collapsed on the floor by now.

  "Here we are," Ania said, pointing to the painting at the end of the hallway. It was the picture of the dog on the tricycle. "Our rooms are in this hallway." If only I had known I was so close to salvation.

  "My room is right here, and your door is two doors down," Ania said, unwrapping herself from my arm. She stumbled and leaned against her door.

  "Thanks, I would have never found this on my own," I said.

  "No, thank you for being my big strong man and helping me to my room," Ania said, giggling. Then she went silent, and her eyes looked me up and down. "Hey, can I ask you something?"

  "Sure, what's up?"

  "What do you think about me? Like what kind of person do you think I am?"

  "That's kind of hard to say. I mean, I barely know you."

  "If you had to take a guess, what would you say?"

  "Hmmm, do you have an Instagram? If so, can I see it?"

  "Of course," Ania said, pulling out her phone. She handed it over and showed it to me. "But why?"

  "Well, you can tell a lot about a person by what parts of their life they allow you to see. But no matter how much someone edits their photos, what types of clothes they choose to wear, or even the filters they decide to apply, at the end of the day those photos and videos are a representation of how someone wants to be seen." I finished scrolling through her phone and handed it back to her. "Deep down, what everyone truly desires is to be the person in the photos or videos all the time and not the person they see in the mirror when they look at themselves every day."

  Ania started to look at me more seductively. "Oh yeah, is that so? Then tell me, Mr. computer boy, what does my profile tell you about me?"

  "You long to be seen as a combination of both beauty and intelligence, yet confident to take on any challenge. You have multiple pictures of you reading, rock climbing, and pictures of you in beautiful scenery. Which means deep down you don't feel smart or pretty, and I'd imagine most of the time you are afraid to do things. But you do them anyway, which means despite all that, you have the courage to move forward."

  Ania's eyes grew wide and then slowly narrowed back to a seductive stare. "Bingo," she said softly.

  I started to feel the sexual tension in the air. "Welp, I really should get ready for bed. I still have a lot of cameras to set up tomorrow," I said, walking towards my room.

  "Hey Tom," Ania called after me. I turned around to see her leaning on her door. "You know, if you don't enjoy sleeping in your bed alone, I have some extra room in mine."

  "Uh...I'm flattered, but I don't think my girlfriend would appreciate that," I said.

  "No, no, I don't think she would," Ania said. Even though she was intoxicated, I could see the sadness in her eyes.

  Reaching my room, I waved one last time and we both went into our separate rooms.

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