I slumped to the floor next to the block of stone that used to be the Golem’s head.

  “A key?” I echoed, my sarcasm failing to mask the gnawing unease. “Okay, so it’s a key. Where’s the lock, then? Did the Sentinel have a secret keyhole somewhere I missed while it was trying to vaporize us? Because I’m pretty sure if I’d seen a giant ‘Insert Crystal Here’ sign, I would have mentioned it.”

  Kaelen’s gaze remained fixed on the Heartstone, the light reflecting in his pupils like captured stars.

  “The legends are vague, Paige. They speak of binding sites, places where the world’s equilibrium was maintained. The Shadow Lord seeks to dismantle those bindings, to unravel the very fabric of Eldoria. If these powers are unleashed…” He trailed off, the unspoken threat hanging heavy in the air.Bartholomew twitched his tail, a slow, deliberate movement.

  “Indeed. The Heartstones are not mere trinkets, my dear Paige. They are anchors. Each one was attuned to a specific nexus of power, a convergence point where the ethereal and the material intertwined. To possess a Heartstone is to hold a fragment of that original control.” He let out a soft, rumbling purr, a sound that somehow managed to convey both satisfaction and deep weariness. “The Sentinel, in its final moments, did not merely shatter. It bequeathed its essence, its core, to a worthy hand. And you, Ser Kaelen, have proven yourself worthy.”

  I glanced between the stoic knight and the ridiculously eloquent cat. This was getting serious, and my internal monologue was starting to sound like a panicked squirrel.

  “So, like, a cosmic ‘find the key, unlock the bad guys’ adventure? I thought we were just trying to stop a giant robot from stomping on us. This is a whole new level of ‘oh crap’.”

  Kaelen finally met my eyes, and the intensity there was startling.

  “This is the level, Paige. The Shadow Lord has been playing a long game. These dormant powers, these ancient evils he seeks to awaken, are the foundations upon which he intends to build his dominion. If he succeeds, there will be no Eldoria left to save. Only shadow.” He turned the Heartstone, its light pulsing gently. “This is our first weapon. We need to understand its power, its purpose. And then we find the others.”

  “Others?” I spluttered. “You mean there’s more than one of these glowing doorknobs?”

  Bartholomew gave a sigh that seemed to vibrate through his very whiskers.

  “Alas, there are three. A tapestry woven from potent threads, and the Shadow Lord seeks to unravel each one. The Heartstones are but the first pieces of a grand, and terrifying, puzzle.”Kaelen nodded, his jaw set.

  “The Sentinel was a guardian of one such nexus. It gave us this.” He carefully wrapped the Heartstone in a clean scrap of cloth he produced from his pack. “And now, we must protect it.”

  My mind raced, trying to process this sudden shift in our mission. We’d stumbled into something far larger than a simple ‘cork the evil bottle’ quest. This was, once again, about the fate of Eldoria. And I, Paige Hawking, communications major and connoisseur of sarcasm, was apparently a key player.

  “Right,” I said, trying to sound more confident than I felt. “So, we take this glowing rock, we find the other glowing rocks, and we…what? Bake them into a pie to ward off evil? Use them as very expensive paperweights for doom?”Kaelen allowed himself a faint smile. It was a rare sight, and it softened the hard lines of his face.

  “We learn, Paige. We learn what they do, who they were meant to guard, and how to use that power against the Shadow Lord. You have a sharp mind, even if it is… uniquely inclined towards levity. And Bartholomew, for all his feline airs, possesses knowledge that spans millennia.”Bartholomew inclined his head regally.

  “A necessity, given the endless procession of oblivious mortals who bumble through the ages. Now, if you will excuse me, I believe I am due for a nap. The machinations of destiny are exhausting.” He stretched languidly, then padded off towards a particularly shrapnel-free patch of floor, curling into a perfect, fluffy ball.

  I watched him go, then turned back to Ser Kaelen. The weight of the situation was settling in. My life, which had felt like a bizarre, ill-fitting costume drama just hours ago, was now starting to feel terrifyingly real.

  “So, adventure time it is,” I muttered, pulling my ill-fitting tunic straighter.A chime sounded in my head as a series of notifications appeared. The first was a quest update.

  [Quest Accepted][Hearts of Stone][Locate the Heartstones and win them from their guardians] [Collect the magical Heartstones. Together, these ancient objects form the key to stopping the Shadow Lord] [1/3]

  The second was a battle summary.

  [You defeated a Mosaic Golem, Lvl 12][Rewards]

  [Diamond Heartstone x1]

  [Mosaic Dust (Pouch) x1]

  [1800XP]+[Decisive Blow Bonus: 200XP]

  I blinked at the XP numbers. That was… a lot, particularly for one creature.

  “Damn,” I muttered and opened the last notification.

  [LEVEL UP!][You have reached Level 6] [All attributes increased!] [New Skill Available: Fury’s Forge][Fury’s Forge] [Novice][At the cost of mana, set your blade ablaze for a short time. Deals fire damage + base damage of the weapon. Can stack with other abilities. Duration and damage scale with ability level.]

  Okay, that’s kinda cool. I kept reading.

  [LEVEL UP!][You have reached Level 7] [All attributes increased!] [New Skill Available: Rain of Terror]

  [Rain of Terror] [Novice][At the cost of mana, you cause it to rain over a set area. Enemies touched by the rain become afraid, causing weak enemies to flee. Affected area scales with ability level.]

  A double level up? I didn’t know that was possible, but you wouldn’t hear me argue. I mentally requested my attribute list to see all the increases from the beginning. To my surprise, it pulled up a whole character sheet.

  [Player Name: Paige Hawking] [Unique Class: Sarcastic Sorceress] [Level: 7]

  [STR: 9]

  [DEX: 13]

  [CON: 11]

  [INT: 21] [With Wit’s Sharpness]

  [WIS: 18]

  [CHA: 16]

  [Passive abilities]

  [Dark Seer, Lvl. 4] [Allows rudimentary, monochromatic vision in complete

  darkness. Range: 25 Feet]

  [Verbal Barrage] [All spoken words possess a 10% chance to deal

  moderate psychic damage to those with weak constitutions]

  [Wit’s Sharpness] [Increases your intelligence and critical thinking by 20%. May

  also cause you to accidentally offend people.]

  [Mana Manipulation] [The ability to access magic. Just because you can, doesn’t

  mean you’re good at it]

  [Active Abilities]

  [Eye Roll of Dismissal] [A focused glare that can momentarily stun or

  demoralize weaker opponents by conveying extreme skepticism.]

  [Minor Heal] [Heal minor aches, cuts, and scrapes. The magical equivalent of

  ‘Walk it off.’]

  [Inspect] [The ability to focus on a creature or object and learn more about it. Does

  not work when in combat]

  [Deft Flurry] [This ability allows a series of sharp strikes in quick succession at the

  cost of accuracy and power. Power and number of strikes increase with each skill

  rank.]

  That was actually kind of helpful. It appears that each level granted one point to each attribute, at least for now. I had been feeling stronger as I progressed, so that made sense. Overall, there wasn’t much to see, but progress was progress. I was almost halfway to the mythical level 16 needed to enter the Shadow Domain.

  Unauthorized use of content: if you find this story on Amazon, report the violation.

  “You know, I’m starting to think this game is more linear than I’d like,” I muttered aloud to no one in particular.

  “Is life not linear?” Ser Kalen responded, “We are born, we live, and we die.”

  “I guess, in a way. It’s that middle bit, though—the living—that gets squirrely. I just don’t like feeling railroaded.”He actually chuckled this time, a deep, resonant sound.

  “That is the beauty of living. It may be set on a course, but it changes in the moment.” He secured the Heartstone in his pack, his movements efficient and deliberate. “We need to keep moving. The longer we linger, the more opportunities arise for the Shadow Lord to learn of our discovery.”

  My heart was still doing a drum solo against my ribs, an energetic encore to our little adventure. I closed my eyes, but all I saw was the shimmering, spectral faces in that pit.

  “Okay, nap time’s over,” I announced to the damp air after about thirty seconds of failed meditation. “Let’s fuck this chicken.”

  “I do not know this phrase.” Ser Kaelen shook his head, “But it seems distasteful.”

  “It just means ‘do the thing you don’t want to do’. Something a coworker used to say.”

  “Ah.” Ser Kaelen offered a hand, which I gratefully took. His grip was firm, calloused, and steady—the complete opposite of how I felt. Bartholomew, meanwhile, was already trotting towards the entrance, his fluffy tail held aloft like a banner of supreme impatience.

  The walk back along the corridor was just as grim as the entrance had been, all weeping stone and the faint, coppery smell of old blood. But as we rounded the final corner, my jaw dropped. Where the chasm of soul-sucking ectoplasm had been, there now stood a bridge. It wasn’t just any bridge; it was crafted from the same pearlescent, semi-translucent material as the Heartstone, glowing with a soft, internal light.

  “Well, look at that,” I said, nudging Kaelen with my elbow. “The dungeon has a fast-pass exit now. How very theme park of it.”

  “It would seem the magic of this place has judged our quest worthy,” Kaelen observed, his tone laced with a reverence I definitely couldn’t muster. He stepped onto the bridge, testing its solidity. It held firm, humming with a low, pleasant thrum.

  “Or it just has a really good customer service department,” I muttered, following him across. I still made a point not to look down.

  Stepping out of the dungeon was like being born. The air, which I hadn’t realized was so stale and dead inside, was suddenly alive. It smelled of damp earth, pine needles, and the clean scent of morning dew. The sun was just cresting the jagged peaks of the mountains to the east, painting the sky in audacious strokes of orange and pink. We’d been inside all night. A wave of exhaustion hit me so hard my knees buckled.

  “Easy,” Kaelen said, his hand steadying my arm.

  “I’m fine,” I lied, blinking spots from my vision. “Just… solar powered. Needed a recharge.”

  The walk back to our pathetic little camp by the watchtower was a quiet one. I was too tired for witty banter, Kaelen was lost in stoic thought, and Bartholomew was busy being a cat, occasionally darting into the underbrush after a field mouse he had no intention of catching. Our camp was just as we’d left it: two bedrolls, the ashes of a fire, and Kaelen’s horse grazing nearby. Home sweet home.

  Kaelen got the fire going again with an efficiency that was both impressive and irritatingly masculine. While he did that, I collapsed onto my bedroll, my leather armor groaning in protest.

  “One must confess,” Bartholomew began, leaping gracefully onto a nearby rock to preen, “that while the acquisition of the Heartstone is a notable achievement, our primary predicament remains. Namely, your lamentable lack of experience.”

  “Gee, thanks for the reminder, fuzzy,” I grumbled into the wool of my blanket.

  “We should make for Aethelgard, the capital,” Kaelen said, not looking up from the fire. “The Heartstone is proof that the Shadow Lord can be wounded, that the Blight can be cleansed. It will be the rallying cry the kingdom needs. I can reunite with my order, and we can petition the King for reinforcements.”

  My head popped up. Capital. Reinforcements. Those were words I liked. They sounded an awful lot like civilization. And civilization meant one very important thing.

  “I’m with Sir Shiny Pants on this one,” I declared, sitting up straight. “Aethelgard sounds great. We can get your army, and I can finally get a hot bath, a non-root-vegetable-based meal, and a very large sack of gold with my name on it.” I winked at Kaelen. “You are still worth a hefty sum, right? AWOL knight and all that?”Kaelen’s jaw tightened almost imperceptibly.

  “The bounty is a trivial matter.”

  “Not to my future landlord, it isn’t,” I retorted.

  “Utter foolishness,” Bartholomew hissed, pausing his grooming to glare at us both. His fur bristled. “You would march directly into the viper’s den? The capital is a cesspool of sycophants and spies, masquerading as a bastion of order. To parade our purpose and the Heartstone before them would be tantamount to sending the Shadow Lord a handwritten invitation to our eventual demise.”

  “He’s got a point,” I conceded, then immediately backtracked. “But I need the money.”

  “The girl requires training, not treasonous political theater,” the cat continued, his voice dripping with disdain. “Her path to power does not lie in the gilded halls of Aethelgard. It is found in the forgotten places of Eldoria, in the monster-haunted wilds where she can hone her abilities. We must find the other Keys. Wasting weeks on a journey to the capital is a luxury we cannot afford.”

  “It’s not a waste if it yields an army,” Kaelen countered, his voice low and firm. He finally looked up from the fire, his grey eyes locking onto the cat. “I respect your knowledge of the arcane, Warden, but I understand the art of war. One girl, no matter how destined, cannot stand against legions of shadow-spawn. We need soldiers. We need a unified front.”

  “And you believe the prattling council and the doddering king will provide this? They have sat on their hands while the renewed Blight consumes their lands for a decade. Your ‘order’ allowed you to be declared a traitor for pursuing the only viable means of victory! You place your faith in a broken system, Sir Knight.”

  Ouch. Bartholomew wasn’t pulling any punches. Kaelen flinched as if struck.

  “Okay, kids, let’s not fight,” I said, holding up my hands in a placating gesture. My communications degree was tingling. “Maybe we can find a compromise. A ‘synergistic solution,’ if you will.” They both stared at me blankly. Right. Wrong audience. “Look. Kaelen needs his army. I need my bounty and also to not die, which an army would help with. Bartholomew, you need me to level up. What if we do both? We head towards the capital, but we take the scenic route. You know, slay a few goblins, raid a few tombs, level me up on the way. Two birds, one Heartstone.”

  “A pointless detour,” Bartholomew sniffed. “The fastest route to your ascension lies in the opposite direction, toward the Sunken City of Aeridor.”

  “The Sunken City is overrun with Naga and worse,” Kaelen stated grimly. “It is no place to train. Aethelgard is the logical choice. It is the safest path.”

  “Safest for whom? For you, perhaps. But safety is the antithesis of progress for her.” Bartholomew gestured a paw at me. “She does not grow stronger by sipping wine in a tavern and listening to bards sing of your valor. She grows stronger by facing the horrors of this world and triumphing.”

  They were at a complete impasse, a knight of logic and duty versus a cat of magic and expediency. And I was stuck in the middle, the sarcastic, under-leveled lynchpin holding the whole stupid quest together. My stomach growled, cutting through the tense silence.

  “Alright, here’s the executive decision,” I said, pushing myself to my feet. “We’re all tired, we’re all hungry, and I smell like the inside of a giant’s codpiece. We’re going to eat whatever rations we have left, get some sleep, and table this discussion until we’re all thinking a little more clearly.” I pointed a finger first at Kaelen, then at Bartholomew. “No strategic planning and no cryptic prophecies until I’ve had at least six hours of sleep. Understood?”

  Kaelen gave a slow, reluctant nod.

  Bartholomew simply turned his back on us, a gesture of ultimate feline contempt, and resumed his grooming.

  “As you wish,” he mumbled into his chest fur. “Delay the inevitable. It changes nothing.”

  I sighed, grabbing a piece of hardtack from my pack. Progress was progress, but it seemed like for every level I gained, the main quest line just got more complicated. And I was pretty sure there wasn’t a dialogue option that was going to make both a knight and a magical cat happy.