“Did the chicken come before the egg, or the egg before the chicken?” Luard asked.

  Chancellor Luard Luminite was lying on his sofa and staring up at the ceiling in his office.

  “Are you alright there, chancellor?” his secretary asks.

  “No. No I am not.” Luard says. “I am questioning the world. I am begging for an answer. Who came first? Krosstetch or Ren. The chicken or the egg?”

  “My lord, we have 2 months of Krosstetch reports and news.” his secretary responds. “I’ve only heard about this Ren girl 2 days ago, and from what I gather she has only been active for 2 octants, moving on 3. If we’re looking at the timing, the two do not seem related. At most, they only came to your attention recently. I think the connection you’re drawing between them is that both of their names hit your desk at the same time. Beyond that, we have no means of definitively saying that they are connected.”

  Right.” Luard lifts himself from his sofa. “How has the second round of background checks been going on Ren?”

  “My lord, it’s been 2 days. We also made the investigator walk to Blue Pine town. He probably hasn’t even arrived in town yet.” the secretary says.

  “Gods…” Luard groans. “Any news on the Krosstetch situation?”

  “A few witnesses spotted the blasted thing flying into the Evershifting mountain range. It’s too dangerous to have someone investigate at this time of year.”

  “No. We just need to send people in expecting them to die.”

  “My lord?” the secretary gives him a confused look.

  “I know 5 adventurers that have agreed to serve the crown or face 40 years in the castle’s dungeon.” Luard says. “Adventurers love deadly odds with next to no chance of survival. Something about staring death down and cheating it, or something.”

  “If- if you say so, my lord.”

  “Any other news I should be apprised of?”

  “Just a minor thing, my lord. You see, we have 7 reports of Krosstetch incidents. I noticed something with the last 3 times it attacked. Our initial incident and the following 3 show that Krosstetch attacked people. I am not sure if these attacks were provoked, but it did indeed injure and kill people. As for these last 3, it seems to have not done so. Rather, it didn’t wound or kill anyone in the last 3 reports I have here. Lastly, it took powder kegs like in your incident 4 days ago.”

  Luard shakes his head and focuses it on his secretary.

  “It what?” Luard says.

  “It is seemingly causing less death and destruction and more theft of specific goods.”

  “O- okay then. Well, let’s put the adventurers up to the task and hope that they at least tell us if this super special wyvern set a nest in the mountain range to hoard all it’s ill gotten gains.”

  “Ah. Yes. Alliot and the party of adventurers.” his secretary nods along. “He came looking for Kanady Vouscherpell.”

  “Ah, right. Was there anything to his claims of her being super evil or whatever?”

  “Nothing solid. She does fine with accounting. All her numbers seem correct. I haven’t seen any misplaced funds or anything.”

  Luard leans back on his cushioned chair and thinks for a moment.

  “If Alliot is wrong, then there is nothing to indicate Kanady has done any wrong. If he is right, then it is possible that some such super illegal charge on the account is not what it claims to be. For example, a charge labeled ‘Lunch’ could really be money going into the evil plot fund.”

  “This would require us to investigate every charge on the account of the crown’s finances.”

  “Not quite.” Luard folds his arms behind his head. “That Ren girl did uncover a lair or secret hideout of some kind, yes? If a connection can be established between that place or the businesses being run as a front, we can shorten our search.”

  “That could do it.” his secretary nods along. “This is, of course, if Alliot is right about Kanady being an evil accountant and not one doing regular accountant things. If you hire another private investigator, it could be the crown’s money wasted on a worthless endeavor.”

  “I can find a cheap guy.” Luard says. “He’s a bit biased, but he should be serviceable.”

  Luard collects some documents from his desk, and prepares to visit someone in the city. As he stands up to leave, a foot bursts through his office door.

  “Oh, uhh…” a voice is heard from the other side of Luard’s office door. “I was kinda expecting it to swing open after that. Woah! Hey! Wait!”

  The leg that kicked a hole into the door violently wiggles as someone opens it.

  “Good morning, chancellor.” a woman says.

  A young woman with deep blue hair joined by young men with similar hair but different eyes enter Luard’s office.

  “We have yet to be properly introduced. I am Sophie Razneck. A pleasure to make your acquaintance.” the woman speaks boldly.

  A young man with matching hair color and a buzzcut then speaks up.

  “Captain Mulbane Razneck.” the stoic man introduces himself.

  The woman who introduced herself as Sophie then points to the last of the two men who joined her. He still has one leg stuck in a hole in the office door.

  “That prattling boy there is Olion Razneck.” Sophie says, pointing to the stuck young man.

  “Woah! Hey! At least let me introduce myself!” the man introduced as Olion stammers as a response.

  Luard gives them all a hard glare.

  “Tradition would normally demand that you introduce yourselves as princes and a princess of the Razneck empire.” Luard says.

  “Tradition would make such a demand of respect, but we are not here for either.” Sophie responds. “It doesn’t matter if we are royals, we are here to work.

  “Yes, let’s not waste any more time with introductions.” Mulbane says.

  “Hey! I still want to be called a prince!” Olion shouts as he continues to violently tug at his leg.

  “We are here because of the events that occurred yesterday during your little festival.” Mulbane says.

  “Yes, yes. I know.” Luard says. “We apologize for any inconvenience or emotional trauma you suffered. Please rest assured that we are looking to rectify the situation.”

  “That is of no concern of ours.” Sophie says. “We are here because our emperor ordered us to fetch that monster. We were to hunt it down. Instead it has come to us, and we were caught unprepared because Oschont Albrinter had us hole up in some manor.”

  “And that is very unfortunate, but we are taking steps to gather more information on your beast.” Luard says.

  “That’s not enough.” Mulbane says. “When we first came here, we announced that we came here to capture and study the strange naturally occurring wyvern.”

  Luard narrows his eyes with his glare.

  “Yes, completely naturally occurring.” Luard says under his breath. “Well, I’m afraid that isn’t possible. You see, our lead has indicated that Krosstetch has fled to the Evershifting mountain range. Do you understand what that means? Our countries used to border on that, but your empire has done a bit of conquering since then.”

  “Yes. We are aware.” Sophie says.

  “The Evershifting mountain range changes every year.” Mulbane says. “Monsters inhabiting the mountain range eat whole mountains and slumbering giant ones roll over in their sleep to cause mountains to shift. Every year, the mountains move, sink and rise. Mapping the mountain range is pointless as it changes each year. At best, cartographers make the trip to neighboring countries to practice their craft. Additionally, monsters stir awake, begin to stockpile food to hibernate, come out of hibernation and a variety of other dangers. And the shifting of mountains begins some time soon.”

  “Well, you seem to understand why it is dangerous to go.” Luard says.

  “When our emperor orders us to find a monster, we find it.” Sophie says. “You will show us whatever witness reports you have. You will deliver to us the aid your little kingdom promised. You will deliver us to the monster.”

  Luard rests his hand on his head for a second.

  “There is no way that I will let you, foreign envoys from the empire, go to the mountains now.”

  “We don’t give a shit.” Mulbane says. “Give it to us. Then we will take care of the dangerous wyvern in your country and we can all go home.”

  Luard gives them a cold hard glare.

  “Sure. You can join the party of adventurers I was going to send.” Luard says. “I was going to gather them, give them a bit of a scolding and then send them on their way.”

  “Excellent.” Sophie says.

  Sophie and Mulbane begin to take their leave. Mulbane grabs Olion by the collar and the three leave Luard’s office. Luard, then points at the door with a hand and chants a spell.

  “Whisper Sanctum!”

  Glass like magic appears on the hole and begins to fill the room. The spell stops anyone from overhearing his next remarks.

  “Pfft, dude, they’re fucking going to die.” Luard chuckles to himself.

  “My lord, are you sure about this?” his secretary asks.

  “Don’t worry about it.” Luard says. “Daddy emperor has a harem and junk. Guy loses more kids to infighting than anything else. What’s these three worth to the bastard? I’m sure he wouldn’t mind if these three died on a mountain top.”

  “And that’s why you will be joined by imperial princes and a princess.” Luard says.

  “Cool.” Ren says in a plane tone of voice.

  Ren, Alliot, Bron, Linda and Malo were sitting in a wagon fitted with a steel cage. Once Ren responded, a castle guard let the 5 of them out. Sophie, Mulbane and Olion look at them being released from a cage with slacked jaws and furrowed brows.

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  “Why were they in a cage?” Sophie asked Luard.

  “Don’t worry about it.” Luard says. “They ride in style. They’re weird like that.”

  “Why does that girl have an arm cast.” Mulbane asks.

  “She tried to do a hand stand and broke it on a fence post.” Luard shrugs his shoulders.

  “Why is she such a cutie?” Olion asks.

  “She eats right, exercises and takes care of her skin and complexion.” Luard says.

  “A hard working girl. I admire that.” Olion coos.

  “She isn’t keeping her health and appearance for you to ogle her.” Sophie snaps at Olion.

  “Okay. Okay. I will hit on her later.” Olion says.

  “Can I stab him?” Ren asks in her usual tone.

  “Yes.” Sophie says.

  “No.” Luard says.

  Ren has brought Olion to his knees and has her arm cast around his neck and a dagger in the other poised to stab into his neck. Olion is in a panic and doing his best to remain as still as possible.

  “Do it!” Sophie says.

  “Don’t do it!” Luard says. “Ren, don’t threaten to stab an imperial prince so readily.”

  “Okay.” Ren says.

  Ren pulls her dagger and arm cast off of Prince Olion.

  “I like her.” Sophie says.

  “Might I remind you what the emperor said about this place?” Mulbane says. “Especially the local people.”

  “Did you miss the part where we blinked and she had a knife to Olion’s neck?” Sophie asks.

  “Hah! You make a compelling argument.” Mulbane chuckles.

  “Alright, big man, what’s our camping situation like?” Alliot asks.

  “You have been allocated some funds.” Luard says. “Buy what you need.”

  “Cool! How much?” Alliot asks while he presses his tongue in his cheek.

  “The imperial royals have them.” Luard says. “I wouldn’t trust you with any of the money.”

  “Boo.” Alliot pouts at Luard.

  “Yeah, yeah. Just take your damn quest.” Luard says.

  Luard waves his hands and a notification appears in the party’s head.

  Quest

  Investigate Krosstetch the Warped Wyvern

  The party of adventurers waves their own hands.

  Quest Accepted!

  “Let’s get a map.” Sophie says. “We can probably get one dirt cheap at this time of year. Grab some jerky, tents and everything along the mountaineering and camping lines.”

  “Cool.” Ren says.

  Ren and the other adventurers begin to walk off to purchase provisions for their march into the maw of death. As they do, the royals look them over from behind. Olion then goes wide eyed as the three of them check the status of the adventurers.

  “Oh holy shit!” Olion gasps.

  “What now?” Mulbane snaps.

  “Look! That Ren girl! Her stat sheet goes on for gods damn ever.”

  “Oh, this should be good.” Mulbane scoffs.

  Mulbane and Sophie look over Ren’s status using the power of the system.

  Ren

  Level 13 Assassin

  Strength: 38

  Magic: 40

  Agility: 37

  Vitality: 34

  Magic Capacity: Clear

  Titles: Blue Pine’s Favorite Adventurer, Ren the Red

  Skills:

  Swordsmanship Level 3

  Netami Style

  Netami Style: Form 1: Flash

  Netami Style Form 2: Swallow Dive

  Netami Style Form 3: Helm Splitter

  Netami Style Form 4: Blade Wave

  Martial Arts Level 2

  Netami Style Form 5: Horizon

  Marksmanship Level 7

  Firearm Level 2

  Knifework Level 8

  Sneaking Level 5

  Dark Step Level 3

  Hit Marker

  Confirm Kill

  Thief’s Sleeves Level 1

  Alchemy Level 1

  Poison Expert Level 1

  Explosive Expert Level 1

  Housekeeping Level 1

  Spells:

  Water Arrow Level 2

  Ice Bolt Level 2

  Fireball Level 1

  Stone Wall Level 2

  Chain Lightning Level 1

  Magic Impact Level 3

  Magic Pierce Level 2

  Haste Level 1

  Raise Zombie Level 1

  Blind Level 2

  Locate Location Level 1

  Project Mind Level 1

  Magic Soft Fall Level 2

  Basic Barrier Level 2

  Whisper Sanctum Level 1

  Magic Sense Level 2

  Invisibility Level 1

  Magic Lock Level 1

  Light Level 1

  Status: Injured, Bandaged

  Left Arm Broken Severity 3

  “Huh?” Mulbane furrows a brow.

  “What in the world am I looking at?” Sophie says.

  “I guess, a girl a fraction of our level with more skills and spells than even our instructors.” Mulbane stutters.

  “That is a very strange girl!” Olion says.

  “Oh gods!” Mulbane says. “He fell for an inferior foreign girl.”

  “Ugh. Royals. Such boring targets.” Agnoir says.

  “I thought you wanted to stab all royals.” Apherward says.

  “No. I want to assassinate all sovereigns and rulers.” Agnoir says. “Princes and princesses are worthless.”

  “So current and present rulers are worthy, but future rulers are worthless?” Warumasa asks. “How does that work?”

  “Because there’s no point to killing them.” Agnoir says in an annoyed tone. “We need to free the people from oppression! Everyone shithead that wears a pretty ass crown or sits on a fancy ass throne needs to be killed! When they are, the people can begin to forge their own destinies unfettered by some dumbass who spends all day everyday in a fucking castle.”

  “Well, yeah but then why not also stab the heirs?” Apherward asks.

  “Oh, bitch please. First, what would stabbing them achieve? Also the achievement is assassinating a ruler on the throne, when they have all that security and shit.”

  “Okay, but why?” Apherward asks.

  “BECAUSE KING KILLING IS AN ASSASSIN’S HIGHEST CALLING, YOU DUMB WIZARD BITCH!!!”

  “Okay. Okay! Relax.” Apherward says.

  “I have brought 6 commoners to achieve such heights! This girl will be my 7th!” Agnoir says.

  “Ah! Impressive.” Warumasa says. “I myself have only managed to make a handful of people warlords. Not quite the uprising sort level, but they have fought for a decent amount of dominance. Ideally, they would have laid waste to the land and such, but you take what you can get.”

  “See! The demon knows that there are goals to strive for!” Agnoir says.

  “I have striven for great heights! I have peeled back the veil of reality and seen the inner workings of the world!” Apherward says.

  “Uh, yeah, sure.” Warumasa says. “How many great wizards or whatever have you ascended to those heights?”

  “I… uh…” Apherward manages to stutter.

  “Ugh, this guy.” Warumasa scoffs.

  The party and royals set off to the Evershifting mountain range. They were riding a wagon to a local lumbermill at the foot of a mountain. On this second day of travel, the sun was beginning to set.

  “There’s a road side camp up ahead, let’s make camp there for the night.” Mulbane says.

  “Sounds good.” Alliot says.

  “The ride isn’t too boring is it, little lady?” Olion says to Ren.

  “I want to slake my blade in fresh blood already.” Ren says as a response.

  “Pfft hahahaha!” Olion kicks his feet up and starts laughing uncontrollably.

  A few others in the wagon don’t laugh as hard as him, but do find it amusing enough to give a laugh or chuckle.

  “Well, maybe there’s a bandit clan around here somewhere.” Malo says.

  Bron snaps his fingers.

  “Borp, take a look around.” he says to the raven on his shoulder. “See if there are any bandit clans around here that could use a good roughing up.”

  “Sometimes I dream about cheese.” Borp the raven says.

  The raven flies off into the distance.

  “We are not here to fight unnecessary battles.” Mulbane says.

  “But I wanna stab people.” Ren says such harrowing words to a complete stranger.

  “I- uh- what?” Mulbane is understandably taken aback by the words from a girl who has her arm in a sling.

  “Delightful.” Sophie chuckles. “Why don’t we split into teams then. You can stay and make camp, and we can go… warm up our muscles before we start our climb.”

  “Fine.” Mulbane snaps. “Do what you want.”

  Sophie snickers at Mulbane. As she does, Borp the raven plops down onto Bron’s shoulder.

  “I knew a turkey once. He ate chickens.” Borp says.

  “Hmm. Sounds like bad news.” Bron nods along with Borp’s words.

  “You understood that?” Mulbane asks.

  “Of course I did.” Bron sounds offended. “What dumbass would carry around an animal companion on dangerous quests when he can’t understand the blasted thing?”

  “Pfft. Yeah dumbass.” Olion chuckles as he speaks.

  “What did Borp say?” Ren asks.

  “Oh, yeah. The campsite the guy over there was talking about is being watched. They come around every few hours and see if anyone is there. If they find some good marks, they call their guys and rush to swarm the place with their guys.”

  “Can I bask my sword in their fresh blood?” Ren asks.

  “You bet your bristles you can!” Bron says with a wink.

  “Woo.” Ren cheers in a tone that does not sound like cheering. “I wanna be on team stab.”

  “I’ll go too!” Linda cheers.

  “Aw, I want to give a bunch of bandits a taste of my twin fireballs and then punctuate with a long shaft.” Malo says. “So that might mean that Bron stays behind.”

  “As the man with the raven who has seen it all, I kinda have to be on the team.” Bron says.

  “It’s okay, you guys go have fun.” Alliot says. “I can sit this one out. You guys have fun. I’ll get camp ready by the time you get back.”

  “Thank you, Alliot.” Linda says.

  “I think I’ll join them in their warmup bloodshed.” Sophie says.

  “Let me come too.” Olion cheers.

  “As you wish.” Sophie shrugs her shoulders.

  There is a moment of pause before Ren turns to ask Alliot a question.

  “Wait, were we supposed to protect them?”

  “Uhh… no.” Alliot says. “Just to find the ugly wyvern. I don’t think fancy pants said anything about protecting these guys.”

  “Okay.” Ren says.

  “Come on! We’re getting off here.” Bron says. “Cart team can give the scouts something to look at. Then we can stab the scouts in the butt. Then we find their friends and kill them all.”

  Bron and Ren immediately hop out. Linda, Malo, Sophie and Olion look to each other for a moment before they hop out to join them.

  “Go around this way.”

  Bron takes the party to a treeline.

  “Through these trees.”

  Bron leads them through a few trees.

  “And hey look! Bandit scouts.” Bron points out two figures.

  These figures have their backs turned to the party and use a spyglass to look at the road.

  “Looks like 2 guys.” a bandits says.

  “Ew, what are they? Gay?” the other bandit says.

  “I don’t know. I can’t just eyeball it and say two guys are gay.” the bandit snaps back.

  “Alright. I’m sorry.”

  “Gods…”

  The bandit goes back to looking through his spyglass.

  “Their cargo is not loaded down. If they’re merchants, they’re certainly not good ones. They look more like travelers. Oh! Hang on… driver seems to be packing a sword. His armor looks a bit light. Guy in the back isn’t packing any heat. Wait, does he have elf and cat ears?”

  “Dude, let me see.”

  “Oh my gods, shut up!”

  The bandit with the spyglass turns to admonish his cohort. As he does, he comes face to blade with the party. Ren was holding a katana of a strange black and red metal while Sophie had a glimmering white rapier. Linda grabbed the other man and held him by the neck with one hand.

  “Where are you and your friends based, you lowlife scum?” Sophie asked.

  “What? No! I’ll never talk!” the bandit says.

  “Girls, what are you doing? Just stab them and be done with it!” Bron says.

  “Don’t we need to know where they are based out of?” Sophie asks.

  “We already do. Borp found the place already.” Bron says.

  “Some people think that corvids and octopoda are going to fight a war of grand intellect, but has anyone stopped to ask if the raven and the octopus would prefer love and not war?” Borp says.

  “Yeah, see!” Bron says. “So stop wasting time with these guys and let’s get to beating the tar out of a bandit camp.”

  “O- okay.” Sophie says.

  Ren has already stabbed the bandit multiple times.

  “Yeah, keep up.” Ren says.

  Sophie gives a sigh and the rapier vanishes in her hand. Lenda also crushes the other bandit’s neck. The party heads deeper into the trees until they come to a clearing. At the center of the clearing are various rough looking men and women, all of whom are armed and somewhat armored.

  “Malo stay behind us.” Bron says. “Can I assume that the little miss here fights with that rapier she had earlier?”

  “Yes, I prefer an up close fight.” Sophie says.

  “And what about you, pretty boy?”

  “I prefer to be at a distance.” Olion says. “I have this pistol here.”

  “Good. Good.” Bron says. “Me and Linda will cut off their escape. Ren and the little miss, here will take the lead.”

  “Okay.” Ren says.

  “As you wish.” Sophie says.

  “Now, everyone, be careful. It’s starting to get dark out.” Bron says.

  Malo and Orion position themselves to support from the rear. Bron and Linda move to flank and stop escapes. When they were in position, Ren quietly sneaks into the bandit camp. Sophie tries to do the same, but nearly kicks over a bucket. Ren has to pulls the bucket from her path. Then Sophie nearly knocks a camping oil lantern stand over. Ren catches it and stops it from falling and shattering on the ground. Sophie looks displeased, grabs the oil lantern and tosses it onto some tent which catches fire. Ren listlessly stares at Sophie and Sophie shrugs her shoulders and gives a bored look to Ren.

  “Gods damn it.” a bandit says. “Who knocked over a lamp?”

  “Not me.”

  “It was Bobby!”

  “Bobby is dead. How could it be a dead guy?”

  “Wait, was Bobby always dead? I could’ve sworn he was alive a second ago.”

  “Yeah, so was the boss. I swear the guy was kicking up a fuss about something or other.”

  “Wait, what?”

  “Wait, why are we all dying?”

  “I think I found the answer.”

  Most of the bandits turn to face the one who last spoke. He has a sword running through his stomach.

  “Hey man, we match!” another boasts beside him.

  He had a sword running through his chest.

  “Anyway, I think we’re under attack.”

  “Yeah, I noticed.”

  Ren and Sophie draw their swords out of their respective stab victims. Despite her arm still in a sling, Ren stabbed a man with her sword. Sophie had a starkly easier time killing than Ren.

  After tearing her sword out of the man’s back, Ren moves to stab and slash in a bid to bathe her sword in more fresh bandit blood. She swings a normal attack against a bandit, but it is stopped as the man manages to stop the swing with his axe. To maintain an aggressive tempo, Ren lets go of her sword to reach for the dagger on her belt. As the strike range of her dagger is much smaller than that of her katana, she needs to step forward and close the distance. Unfortunately, the axe the bandit uses is longer than the dagger. The bandit throws out a wild swing, but it is enough to threaten Ren and force her to back away. Ren responds by continuing her aggressive tactics.

  “Dark Step.”

  Ren vanishes from the bandit’s vision and reappears behind him. Ren deftly stabs her dagger under the man’s arm and into his chest. Once this bandit doubles over Ren looks for her next victim. However, she finds that most of the bandits are already on the ground dying. Over a dozen men were dead around Ren without her notice. In the distance, Ren sees Sophie running a man through the chest with a massive claymore and lifting him up by the blade embedded in his stomach.

  “What, you only got one?” Sophie scoffs.

  Sophie hefts her sword and throws it at another bandit. The massive blade is about as big as the man it cuts and sinks in deep then explodes in a fiery explosion. She opens her hand and a boomerang appears there. She throws it and a dust devil kicks up as it cuts through the air. When the boomerang and dust devil meet a bandit, the wind seems to cut at him and soon a whirlwind of blood sprays in every direction. Sophie swiftly turns and prepares a heavy swing without a weapon in her hand. As the swing’s wind up reaches it’s apex, a massive axe appears in her hands and she swings down onto a bandit’s head. The bandit’s head is split and she releases her axe. The axe vanishes from the bandit. Next, what appears to be a circular saw on a pole appears in her hands. She thrusts the blunt end into a bandit’s abdomen and brings the saw across the same man’s neck. The bandit’s head violently jerks as the saw spins and the saw teeth sprays blood out. The saw then vanishes and a musket appears in Sophie’s hands. She seemingly doesn’t line up the musket for a shot, but fires it anyway. The musket ball hits a distant bandit. The musket remains unloaded and simply vanishes from her hands. Men and women come apart before Sophie’s various weapons. When Sophie takes a moment to catch her breath, she sneers at Ren.

  “Come on, Ren. Keep up.”