The hedge-awakened support program was a turning point brought about during the seventh imperial era. Along with the creation of other prominent institutions, the revolution included founding of the imperial libraries, adventurers’ guild, and heresy hunters.

  — Excerpt from History of the Empire

  Day 106, 9:45 AM

  “You are a slim young man.” I got up and rotated a full bookcase, moving it so that Newstar could stand behind it. “You can fit here.”

  While Newstar took up his position, I instructed Hammer to bring Jasmine Steelwheel over, then righted the bookcase and sat down so the boy could see everything. I didn’t really have to do much, the girl put herself out before me, thoroughly shattering the naive boy’s illusions. She might have even stripped had I asked, but that would have started endless trouble.

  If Newstar got enraged or lost his temper he might have attacked. Then I would’ve had to kill or incapacitate him, and the loop would have had to start again. Looping once wouldn’t do me much harm, but later, I would say the same about two or three, and before I knew it I would become a rambling madman talking with strangers as if they were friends, answering questions before they were asked and those would later spiral into worse psychological problems.

  No, best treat final loops as final, not as final unless. Madness stalked that road. I knew because I had trod it once.

  The girl closed the door, and I went over to move the shelf behind which the zombified kid stood, his heart broken, his brain on vacation.

  “So?” I startled him awake from his out-of-body experience. “Are you going to say something about me controlling her mind, forcing her, drugging her? Maybe she was not your Jasmine, but a body double, an illusion?”

  Newstar gave a solemn stare, looking like, well, a man disappointed with his significant other, even if there was nothing significant between him and Jasmine Steelwheel. He took it worse than I had expected, so I clapped him on the shoulder and he stumbled forth.

  “Cheer up! At least you discovered her duplicity early, before committing to the cause and making lasting mistakes. I would offer to parade my girls for you to see, but you are not in the mood, and they are no good for you. Prettier and less scummy than this one, but you can do better.”

  The daughters I had with Manny were all lionesses and amazons, after their mother’s mold, any one of them I could offer as a good fit for the future overlord standing before me. Dandelion’s brood, however, was disappointing. Spoiled and slow of wit, unfortunately taking after their father.

  Talking with them felt weird for all of us, but I had to interview them in case there was a gem amongst them. I did the same with his sons, but nothing worth mentioning there either. Still, I would have to leave some funds for them before I leave. I did take their father’s body from them, even if Dandelion wasn’t much of a father. I considered myself a bad parent, but I was leagues ahead of the deceased townlord.

  The boy looked at me with a broken gaze. “Am I dreaming? Is this a nightmare?”

  I pinched him, and he yelped.

  “You seem awake to me. Never doubt your senses or instincts. Do not blindly follow them either, since the scene happening before you might not be the whole truth—”

  “Why?” The youth interrupted me.

  Why what? Why are you awake, why you shouldn’t doubt your senses? It wasn’t those. He was hardly listening to what I was saying. The girl still occupied his mind.

  “Well, she cares little about men,” I explained, “possibly not at all, and she believes she can use her body as—”

  “Why are you telling me all of this?”

  Ah, that “why?” I thought I was already clear enough, but there was no harm in being repetitive and blunt. They were, to an extent, key pieces of who I was.

  If you spot this narrative on Amazon, know that it has been stolen. Report the violation.

  “I told you, I want to make friends with you. You are a talented individual who will go far, Newstar. And amiability is king. After careful consideration, I have decided to make it my path some two weeks ago.”

  Technically, I reached the decision when he stabbed me dead, years ago, but that moment was in an immediate, but hopefully impossible future. Technically, within two weeks of our conversation.

  “Path?” He didn’t bother to understand time travel’s intricacies, but that was fine; neither did I, so I returned to the conversation.

  “Yes, path.” I spread my arms to encompass the whole world. “The direction you wish to advance as an awakened and a person. Violence and aggression can only take you so far, and committing myself to someone else’s laws does not sit well with my personality. I have dabbled a bit in alchemy and forging, but I do not see crafting as my path. That said, I would like to improve my expertise when I get the chance, but that is for the future. Especially when it comes to alchemy.”

  “Could you speak slower?” The youth blinked in confusion, and I realized some of my looping was bleeding out of me.

  “Certainly. I have gone ahead of myself. What is confusing you right now, save for your anger and disappointment? I’ll ask freely, now that you know I’m not a kidnapper and an abuser of women.”

  Old Dandelion was one. The way the staff dressed was a clear indicator of abuse taking place. All the women heaved a breath of relief when I had Hammer commission new, considerably more modest, uniforms. And with Newstar visiting, I was glad I had done that. Distaste and general human decency motivated me more than a preparation for an insecure youth’s visit, but the results were positive for all parties involved.

  The youth stared blankly at me, his brows furrowing and relaxing as he tried to make sense of things. He was failing spectacularly. Finally, he sighed in surrender.

  “What do you want me to do now?”

  “Have some tea. Go and sleep or meditate on what you have learned, and think about what you want to do with your life. Come back when you set your mind straight. We can talk then.”

  “What about the tournament?” He brought up the weirdest and most irrelevant thing at the moment, probably unable to process the more important things.

  I shrugged. “What about the tournament?”

  I came up with the whole thing because his family was broke; he needed the money, and he would compete in it for a week, buying me time to prepare for the next step of my plan, which again heavily involved him. Not because I needed his help, but because he needed mine, and I wished to build a solid foundation of trust.

  I almost laughed at myself. I was staging the entire thing, and yet I was doing it all to build trust. That wasn’t to say I was untrustworthy. I just needed time to prepare.

  Then he asked something which completely blindsided me.

  “Do you want me to join your gang? To become a guard or an enforcer, is that it?”

  “No.” While having him as a subordinate would have been helpful, it wasn’t the type of cooperation I was looking for. Besides, the region we lived in was too small of a pond for two sharks. “This place is a dump, and I am leaving it after the tournament.”

  I flashed him a smile. “Got to see things through to the end.”

  The dismay in his eyes skyrocketed, and I almost burst into laughter, ruining the wise-man act.

  “Why? Where?”

  “A lot of questions from someone who refuses to give answers, but I’ll indulge you. Those short questions have a rather lengthy answer. Do you think my answer will help you process your own thoughts better?”

  Newstar nodded, and I obliged his curiosity.

  “First, why; because this place is a dump. It is a chain binding me to this backwater, where even the imperial library merely has documents fit for awakened of fourth realm and below. But even those documents are enough for me to understand that my realm has deviated, and that my mistakes will cost me a bright future.”

  And really, what I cared about the most out of all my lives was my future. The way the legal system worked, I had nearly no chance of advancing Anarchist until I reached the tenth realm. But I had found a peaceful moment in Hailstown, learning everything I can for the next life. Most of it would become obsolete in a different world, but some skills would translate to a tangible benefit in my future lives, just like my weapons’ skills carried over. And since I had the chance and understood what was happening, I planned to make the most of it.

  The thought made me feel old, and I sighed.

  “I am old, but I wouldn’t mind living a long life full of adventure before eventually reincarnating. Someone dear to me once said I should enjoy myself more without binding myself with things I do not find worthwhile. Even with all the time in the world, you should pursue your interests, and not those of others.”

  I stopped talking and a heavy, but not unpleasant, silence drowned the room.

  “Are you a god?” he asked, and I roared in laughter.

  “I killed a pair once.” Well, sealed them, but it’s the effort that counts. “But no, I am human, and despite what the rumors about me say, I do not share their preference for virgin sacrifices. Experienced women make much better company.”

  The look on his face was priceless as he choked on spit and started coughing.

  “As for where, the world is a big place. What I am interested in the most right now are the imperial libraries and the guilds. I still cannot believe such a treasure trove of knowledge is available to everyone, and yet so few use the privilege.”