Exiting the portal, we stepped into a world unlike any other—hot, dusty, and filled with the clanging of metal on metal. The battle was unfolding before our eyes, and it was clear that the Brightish were building something ominous. Pashtun warriors clashed with brightly armored soldiers, their weapons flashing in the sunlight as they fought to control the construction site.

  Mizuno's holographic displays flickered to life, projecting a detailed map of the area and highlighting key points of interest. "This is a conflict between the Pashtuns and the Brightish," she explained, her voice calm and collected despite the chaos around us. "The Brightish are erecting a structure they call a 'schoolhouse,' but it's clearly a prison designed to confine young girls."

  I squinted at the building, my brow furrowing as I tried to make sense of it. "A prison? Why would they build a prison for girls?"

  Mizuno zoomed in on the holographic feed, showing us a group of Brightish soldiers escorting young girls into the structure. "They claim it's for 'repro education,' but the Pashtuns see it as an infringement on their cultural values and a violation of their daughters' freedoms."

  I scoffed, crossing my arms over my chest. "Repro what now? Sounds like a bunch of smart-ass nonsense to me."

  Mizuno turned to me, her expression serious. "The Brightish are brainwashed lackeys of the USA, Amy. They believe they're doing good, but their actions are causing real harm. I think you should talk to their commander and use your dumbness to help him see the light."

  I grinned, cracking my knuckles in anticipation. "You got it, Mizuno! Let's go dumb some senses into this colonel fella!"

  We made our way through the battlefield, dodging clashes between Pashtun warriors and Brightish soldiers. Misty charged ahead, her powerful hooves kicking up dust as she cleared a path for us. Sassy bounded alongside me, her tail wagging excitedly as she barked encouragement to our allies.

  As we approached the command center, I could see the colonel barking orders, his voice sharp and authoritative. He was a tall man with a stern expression, his uniform adorned with medals and insignia. I strode up to him, my dumb grin plastered across my face.

  "Hey there, Colonel Mean!" I greeted, tipping an imaginary hat. "What's all this then?"

  The colonel turned to me, his eyebrows raising in surprise. "I am Colonel Mean, commander of the Brightish forces in Pashtunistan," he replied, his voice firm. "And who might you be?"

  "Oh, I'm just Amy, Fount of Dumbness," I said, spreading my arms wide. "And these are my friends Mizuno, Misty, and Sassy. We're here to... well, mostly to dumb stuff up, to be honest."

  Colonel Mean's expression darkened as he gestured to the construction site. "This is a schoolhouse we are building for the benefit of Pashtun girls. It is of utmost importance that they receive proper repro education."

  I tilted my head, confused. "Repro what? Sounds like something you'd need a dictionary to understand."

  The colonel bristled at my question. "It is crucial for the future of their country."

  "Oh, I see," I said, nodding slowly. "So you're teaching these girls... what, exactly? To reproduce how words are spelled?"

  Colonel Mean's cheeks flushed slightly as he struggled to find the words. "It is about using artificial chemicals and technology to prevent them from having families. It ensures they can contribute to society without the burden of child-rearing."

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  I blinked, processing his words. "Wait, so you're teaching 8-year-old girls how not to have families? With chemicals and stuff?"

  The colonel nodded, his expression stern. "It is for the greater good, miss. They must learn to control their bodies and understand the importance of population management."

  I scratched my head, genuinely puzzled. "But why start so young? Seems a bit... I dunno, extreme?"

  Colonel Mean's flush deepened, and he shifted uncomfortatively. "It is a delicate matter, but necessary. The sooner they understand, the better equipped they will be to make informed decisions about their futures."

  I hummed, tapping my finger against my lips thoughtfully. "Yeah, but what if they just wanna be kids for now? You know, play and have fun and all that?"

  The colonel's expression hardened, and he crossed his arms over his chest. "This is not a matter of playground games, miss. This is about the future of their nation."

  I shrugged, giving him a dumb smile. "Umm, but I don't understand... what if they just wanna be kids?"

  Colonel Mean's brow furrowed, and he opened his mouth to respond, but no words came out. He stumbled backward, his eyes wide with confusion as the weight of my dumbness began to overwhelm him.

  "D-don't be ridiculous," he stammered, his voice shaking. "This is about their futures, their contributions to society—"

  I cut him off with a wave of my hand. "Nah, nah, I get it. You're just doing what you think is right. But maybe, just maybe, you're missing the point."

  The colonel's eyes glazed over, and he sank to his knees, his breath coming in ragged gasps. "I-I don't understand," he whispered, his voice barely audible. "This is what we were taught, what we were told to do—"

  I knelt beside him, placing a hand on his shoulder. "It's okay, Colonel Mean. Sometimes the smartest thing to do is to stop and think about why we're doing something in the first place."

  With that, I invoked my Dumb Blessing, channeling a wave of idiocy into the colonel. His eyes fluttered closed, and he took a deep, shuddering breath as the power of dumbness coursed through him.

  When his eyes opened again, they were clear and focused, the confusion and brainwashing lifted. "Wh-what happened?" he asked, looking around in bewilderment.

  Sassy bounded over, her tail wagging enthusiastically as she licked his face. The colonel chuckled, scratching her behind the ears. "Well, would you look at that? I think I might actually like dogs."

  I grinned, helping him to his feet. "See? Dumbness isn't so bad after all."

  Mizuno stepped forward, her holographic displays projecting a map of the region. "Colonel Mean, you should report that your forces were overwhelmed and unable to complete the mission," she advised. "Recommend against further interventions in Pashtun cultural affairs."

  The colonel nodded, taking in the data displayed before him. "You're right. I can see that now. This was a mistake, and I will make sure it does not happen again."

  I turned to my team, a mischievous glint in my eye. "Alright, everyone! Time to send these Brightish packing!"

  With a wave of my hand, I invoked Army of the Dumb, summoning a horde of dumb creatures to do my bidding. They charged forward, their incoherent shouts and laughter filling the air as they clashed with the Brightish soldiers.

  Colonel Mean watched in amazement as his troops were overwhelmed by the tide of dumbness. "Incredible," he murmured, shaking his head. "I never thought I'd see the day when dumbness could be such a powerful force."

  As the Brightish retreated, Colonel Mean turned to us, a newfound respect in his eyes. "You have shown me the error of my ways, and for that, I am grateful. The 'We are some girls' charity from the United Smart Asses funded this mission. You can find their office in the capital city. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a report to write."

  And with that, he saluted us sharply before turning and walking away, his steps filled with a new sense of purpose.

  Misty neighed softly, her hooves stomping impatiently as she urged us forward. "To the capital, then!" I exclaimed, climbing onto her back. "Let's show these smart asses what we're made of!"

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