The chamber remains silent in the dark.

  Lay motionless on my bed as I stare blankly at the canopy drapes. One hand rests over my forehead, while the other clutches both imperial insignias that mom and dad used to wear.

  My body feels unbearably heavy, as if the weight of the entire empire is pressing down and crushing me into nothingness along with this night.

  Since regaining consciousness two days ago, my mind has been in turmoil. Right after I woke up, I learned what happened during and after my coming-of-age ceremony when I was unconscious, although brief from Misaki, my royal maid and the others.

  Now, the empire and its fate rests solely on my shoulders.

  As I clutch on these insignias, I curl up on my side on my grand bed.

  My brows furrow as a shaky breath escapes my parted lips. As if seeking for comfort, my hand moves, clutching at the silken fabric underneath me.

  But it offers none. Nothing does.

  If not for the occasional slivers of light slipping through the curtains, I would have lost all sense of time. Nearly two days had passed in my chamber. With my mind in turmoil, I lost count of how many times I had cried. Faint traces of dried tears stained my pillow.

  xxx

  I couldn't bear their presence at that moment and tried to force them out. But the strain on my body prevented me.

  “Your Majesty—!” They cried out while rushing forward.

  Misaki hurried to my side and caught me from falling to the floor, her grip lingering on my shoulders.

  However, the words of ‘Your Majesty’ were like shackles, tightening around me, forcing me back into a role that I was unable to escape. It was as if they expected me to simply accept what happened that day—as if saying those words will make it real, make me embrace this throne through such a way that I never want.

  But I can’t. I’m not ready…

  ‘Why must you all be so cruel? Can’t you see I’m already broken? Yet you remind me of it again and again, carving the wound even deeper…’

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  “Just get out already!” I shouted at them even though I barely have any energy left.

  “But…” Misaki said worriedly, she was afraid to let go of me.

  Her sight of trembling and clenched fists, her eyes filled with desperate concern—she wanted to stay.

  Before she could finish it, the usually carefree and teasing Rinako dragged Misaki out, together with the others, her usual mischief was absent. Before Rinako turned her back to drag Misaki out, I caught it — Rinako’s eyes, shimmering with unshed tears.

  Sealing myself away from the world.

  A part of me foolishly hoped that by isolating myself, I could escape the truth and reality.

  But the truth does not always grant mercy.

  Being alone should have helped ease the weight… but it is not enough.

  xxx

  Nothing will change what has already happened.

  Not even this Dragon’s Blessing can rewind time.

  A single thought comes into my mind, cold and quiet.

  ‘If I die, I won’t have to endure this turmoil anymore.’

  Perhaps death is the only way to be free. To be relieved of these overwhelming burdens, the suffocating agony that clings to my soul, eating away at whatever remains.

  The weight has been unbearable, but I can escape with this.

  ‘Dying must be the only way.’

  The thought solidifies as I instinctively manifest my sword into existence.

  Sitting up slowly,

  “—Ting!”

  Something falls to the floor, shining faintly in the dark.

  The imperial insignias from mom and dad. They must have slipped when I moved.

  ‘When did I let go of them?’

  For a moment, I stare at it. Then, my eyes lower to the sword resting on my bed.

  My hand moves—slow, hesitant—as I reach for the cold steel of the blade.

  Why is it trembling?

  It is not from weakness. Not exhaustion. Then why?

  I choose not to give it much thought, there is no point after all.

  My fingers graze the cold steel of the blade. I close my eyes and exhale a shaky breath.

  But even in darkness, right before death, there is no escape.

  The whispers return—haunting echoes of that day. The moment everything was stolen from me. The screams, the blood—they replay in my mind as if I had witnessed it myself.

  But I didn't. I was unconscious, unaware of what truly happened.

  All I know is what I had seen and what they told me. Yet, the whispers persist, as if trying to convince me that I had seen it all with my own eyes.

  They do not stop.

  They coil around me like iron chains, dragging me deeper into the abyss.

  If only I wasn’t born… If only I didn’t exist…none of this would happen.

  My grip tightens around the sword’s hilt.

  “I’m sorry…”