" Le, gatak ja." ( Here, gobble these up.)

  " Ye kya hai? Kahan se aye?" ( What are these? Where did they come from?)

  " These are called almonds, they are nuts, they are not tasty, but they boost energy, now eat." I explained to Rabeena like one would explain a child.

  " I know what an almond is." Rabeena snorted, " but where did they come from?"

  " Oh, I did some gili gili hocus focus, and conjured them out of thin air." I said in an dead pan tone.

  " What do you mean?"

  " Ufff ! You ask too many questions. My mom sent a whole packet with me, so I can get occasional bursts of energy in between meals." I said, " I hadn't needed them until now, but seems like you do."

  " But-"

  " No 'but'. Do what I say. Let's see if my method can level up your stamina."

  It's been two weeks since our training had started. But Rabeena is showing lack of stamina and had passed out 5 more times this week.

  Though I think she is improving and to me her progress seems okayish compared to given time, but our TO is not happy with it.

  Last evening he had personally called Rabeena to meet him after training. And she very predictably had insisted me to come along.

  " You need to increase your stamina as soon as possible, or I will have to discontinue your course." He had said to her. Then had told me to help her anyway possible.

  As my attention snapped back to the present, I found Rabeena trying hard and failing to swallow the almonds. I handed her water bottle and popped two almonds in my mouth. One can always use a few extra calories.

  Rumor is, today some rock climbing exercise is included. I chewed the almonds and chugged it down with some water.

  " Can I ask what you are trying to do?" Rabeena asked as we made our way to the training ground.

  "Well, I have this plan." I said after a few moments of thinking how to explain it. " You mainly come short during the morning drill, that could only mean that you are lacking energy. Now I am going to feed you 4 almonds every morning to provide you with some calories. Next week I will cut down the almonds to 3 then the week after that it would be brought down to 2 or 1 depending on your progress. So by 3-4 weeks you will be able to endure the training without needing smuggled in calories. "

  Rabeena didn't seem to be convinced, but nodded anyways, and faced the training ground in front.

  As it had turned out, those 40 push ups weren't part of regular beginner's training. It's just a specialty of our TO to see where his trainees stand.

  Now we start our day with a 3 hour long morning drill, then we eat breakfast ( which by the way tastes heavenly after such a tiresome training). After that we get a lecture on army's rules and regulations, it's history, train some more.

  After lunch, in the afternoon, we play basket ball( which I suck at) or football( which also I suck at, specially to keep up with others, since they got longer legs).

  To my relief, Rabeena did not show any signs of fainting in the morning drill.

  After breakfast, which always tastes like heaven after so much training, we were taken to the ground where an obstacle course had been set up.

  Half of us were lined up in front of a towering wall from where hung a bunch of sturdy ropes. And the other half had to run through the obstacles course first.

  I was in the second lot. When my turn came, the sun was well up in the sky.

  I walked up slowly in front of the starting line, reviewing the obstacles in my way and planning how to conquer them. Just 2 or 3 turns before, Rafique had done it with outmost elegance. Replaying how he did it, I ran through the course.

  I jumped over hurdles(3ft), climbed a steep hillock using momentum, jumped from it and landed on my feet. Then I ran through lined up tyres for 30m, walked on a 15 m long zigzag balance, and jumped over a 10ft ditch. Then I crawled under a net for 35m and finally crawled through a tunnel which looked too similar too a culvert.

  When I reached the finishing point, the instructor gave me a nod, and said, " 15 minutes. You need to work on your time."

  With that word of praise, I went near the rope climbing course, huffing like crazy.

  The wall loomed over me at least 15 feet tall. The net made of rope, all of a sudden didn't look so sturdy, it was swaying like insane.

  I heard the instructor's whistle and ran to the very base of it. Wiping my sweaty palms on my pants , I took hold of the rope.

  I set my foot on the rope which swayed under my weight. I held the rope tightly to prevent myself from toppling over.

  Shaking, I pulled myself higher with mostly arm strength.Then I tried to adjust my foothold , but I slipped and landed on my back.

  Before I could figure out what happened, my instructor whistled sharply three times right before my ears. “Again!"

  Therefore I tried to climb again. But again, I fell back down.

  I tried climbing for the third time. Even made some progress, but that too went in vain. After a climbing the third step, my footing slipped again.

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  I gritted my teeth and tried for the fourth time. After climbing 2 steps up, I had to depend mostly on my arm strength to regain my composture. Everyone around me was also climbing. Therefore, the rope was shaking violently and swinging crazily. This made me lose my hold again and I fell down for the fourth time, barely avoiding banging my head.

  Ignoring the snickers that were thrown at me, I tried again. Focusing all my concentration and using mostly arm strength and avoiding dependence on my legs, I climbed and climbed and climbed until I was only one step away from the top.

  I reached out my hand to grab the top.But then guess what? Of course I slipped and lost my balance. And this time I ended up tangled in the net looking at the world upside down. Last thing I remember before seeing all black was that Rathore Sir was running towards me with medics and other faculties.

  * * * * *

  I could hear a faint sound of urgency, but couldn't really make it out. Tanisha, Tanisha! Tanisha!! What was that? What is Tanisha? It sounds familiar. Tanisha Saha. Wake up! Is that my name? . . .

  Yeah, that's definitely my name.

  What is pinching my wrist? . . . Feels like a hand.

  Something wet and cold is falling on my face.

  I don't like the feeling at all.

  I spluttered awake, trying to snort away the water that had gone into my nostrils. Instantly, the bright sunlight blinded me, blood rushed to my head, making me clutch it tightly.

  I heard a couple of relief's eyes. My arms and legs hurt and my head felt dizzy. I blinked hard to adjust my eyes to the brightness and found myself sitting on a bench. The medical staff were fumbling with me to check for injuries. Rathore sir was standing behind them, Looking at me with.. pity?......concern?..

  I avoided my eyes and managed to croak, "Water?"

  After drinking water when I felt better and stable Sub. Rathore asked, " How many tries?"

  "Sir fifth."

  "Do you feel Better now?"

  "Yes, sir, I will go try again." saying this, I stood up and immediately regretted it. Yellow spots danced in front of my eyes. I was pushed back down.

  "I appreciate the enthusiasm, but that's it for you today. You are not trying anymore." Rathore sir told me sternly

  "But sir-" I started.

  " SHUT UP. Learn to know your limits." He snapped. " there is no bravado in knocking yourself out and concerning others."

  " Sorry sir. " I mumbled with a head hung low.

  " Now if you feel good enough to move, go sit on the bench at the west."

  As I reached that bench , I found a gloomy but familiar face already sitting on it.

  "Hey!" Deepak's face lit up and he stood. But his smile faltered when I sat on the bench.

  "You're not here to call me back?" He asked gloomily, sitting down again.

  "Excuse me?" I looked at him puzzled.

  "I thought Rathore sir sent you to call me back in training."

  "No , he sent me to sit here for rest of the day."

  After a moment of pause, he spoke again, -"You know , I had not expected you of all people to be sitting here."

  I frowned at him, " why?"

  "You seem to excel at everything. Your stamina is so high and you never get a stick up your hindsight for wrong posture. You are literally perfect. Well, accept for maybe basketball."

  "You didn't need to point out the last bit after such a flattering praise." I laughed. "But as you said, I seem to excel. I don't excel everything, at least not effortlessly. It seems to you. And my posture and stamina is good because I have been working on it for years.You will also improve with practice."

  "Hope so." he smiled and looked into the field, where everyone except us was training. "So what went wrong?Why you got sent here."

  " I proved that I am no monkey."

  "What?"

  "Nothing much, just ended up tangled in the rope net upside down."

  He gave me a sympathetic pained smile.

  " I have done so many things in life, but never bothered to attend a short mountaineering course." I exhaled. It sucks to watch everyone else train while you're not allowed to do anything and just sit.

  "Anyway what went wrong with you?"

  "Well, you know the ditch you have to jump over in the obstacle course? I fell into it and twisted my ankle."

  I winced. The ditch was kinda deep.

  After a while Deepak spoke again in a conversative manner, " Didi, where are you from?"

  " West Bengal." I said, " Didi?"

  " You must be older than me." He shrugged.

  " And what makes you come to that conclusion? You implying I look old, Chadda?" I raised an eyebrow at him.

  He fumbled, "No no, because everyone else is."

  I frowned," How old are you?"

  " Will turn 18 in four months."

  I raised my eyebrows, " You are pretty young, Deepak. And yes, that would make me a couple of years older than you."

  " Hey, can I ask you something?" I asked after pondering about the fact for a bit.

  " Sure." He said cheerfully.

  " Why would you join army in such a young age? You are not even an adult yet."

  " I wanted to serve the country." He told me as if it was the most obvious thing. At least he pretended so.

  He might have made anyone else believe him, but not me. A second of his hesitation and an increased pitch was enough.

  " Deepak, I am not an interviewer. You don't need to give me morally correct answers. "

  He gave a small smile and gazed into the horizon.

  After a couple of minutes he dropped his gaze and heaved a sigh. All of a sudden he didn't seem like the youthful, free spirited boy anymore, but more of a matured and responsible person.

  " I need to support my family." He said quietly. " Dad passed away four years ago. My old mother runs a tailoring shop to sustain us. But income from that small alone isn't enough for all of us." He looked at me sadly. I stayed silent and let him speak.

  " I have two sisters after me you know." He smiled and looked up at the sky. " I got 86% in 10th, but I had to drop out and work as a Indane delivery boy. It still wasn't enough.

  "Then the army recruitment notice came out. They pay you over 17k just at the time of training. It's way more than both mine and my mother's income combined. Seemed like a good deal.

  " Now maa would not have to stay up late sewing, my sisters would have proper education. I can provide them with full meals and nice clothes. Army was my best option." He finally smiled fully, as if those thoughts made him happy.

  I patted his shoulder and smiled back at him. " You are a very brave person Deepak, and a very responsible one. Your family as well as your father from heaven is feeling very proud of you."

  Deepak's always a cheerful boy. It was very hard to believe that he had went through such hard struggles. It made me sad that such a sweet boy had suffered so much. But at the same time it also made me happy that unlike most people, these sufferings had not sent him spiraling into depression. Instead he genuinely worked hard to improve his situation, and didn't let the pain and sadness of his past effect his cheerful youth. It's something everyone should learn from him. At that moment I felt very proud of him. Still a thought was nagging at me, " What about your education?"

  " Huh?" He looked at me puzzled.

  " Don't you want to continue with your studies? At least the 12th?"

  He looked at me with big eyes, with an expression too close to gratitude.

  Though it caught me by surprise, when a lone tear rolled down his cheek, I understood. All this time he had been thinking about taking care of his mother, providing for his sisters. He was the eldest son, therefore expected to step up and take responsibility. But often in the process, the eldest children have to let go of their dreams and passion, and the pressure of responsibility makes them forget that they, too, can have their own needs, wishes and dreams to fulfil.

  Me asking about his education might be the first time in long that someone had asked about himself.

  " Well if you ever want to pursue your studies again, and need any help or guidance, you know where to find your Tanisha-Didi."