The sea reminds me of dreams I used to have. The splashes of adfish and the squawks of adgulls circling the mast of the vessel.
Yes... the perversion of normality still goes strong in this journey.
I glance at my companions doing their own thing.
The Saintess is striking a pose for some kind of cutesy photo op—she winks at my drirection.
Shiverrrssssss.
The Princess is standing stoically, facing the path ahead. She actually looks kinda cool, her blocky aura somehow framing her in a dignified way.
I move down to a seat and try to sit on it...
Pop-up Ad detected:
"THIS SEAT HAS BEEN CLAIMED BY THE SEAT GOD. PAY TO SIT OR DIE!"
It then dies in a scream of torment.
Honestly, Caladblock has been the best acquisition I’ve ever made. Free, reliable, and cute. A true holy sword.
Then, a scrawny, bookish worm girl sits next to me. She fidgets a few times, then just sits there awkwardly. I quietly admire the ocean view like a normal person.
Suddenly, she mumbles under her breath:
"Damn that hag of a boss. Never takes feedback, always piles on overtime..."
And at the same time, we both mutter:
"Screwed is the hard labor of loyal workers."
She looks at me with wide eyes.
I nod solemnly. Understanding is born between us.
She stammers:
"...Are... you...?"
I just hug her, totally a normal thing to do.
"Yeah. Let it all out. It’s been hard."
She struggles at first—punches me a couple of times—but then magically... starts hugging back.
Sniffling:
“Why are you doing this? We just met...”
“I wanted someone to do the same thing to me in my hellish office job life. Just accept it with grace.”
She freezes, then... hugs me tighter. For a solid five minutes.
Then quietly:
“...Thank you.”
We both stare out at the sunset.
Nervously, she asks:
“What’s your name?”
“Friends call me Hajime.”
This narrative has been unlawfully taken from Royal Road. If you see it on Amazon, please report it.
She fidgets again:
“Your name sounds like the new hero… Are you related?”
I reply:
“I’m no hero. I’m just a man trapped in a hell of my own negligence..." Getting pop-up ad into this world was truly a mistake.
She sighs and nods:
“The hero screwed over one of my bosses... and now the fallout’s is on me. So I’d like to know... why did it happen?”
She starts sobbing again.
Shit.
I feel guilty, but honestly, that game really was trash.
She continues:
“If only I knew what the hero was thinking... Maybe we could’ve had a flagship title! Now it’s all just dog shit!”
I cough lightly.
“Good luck with that, Miss.”
“My name’s Melissa.”
“Nice to make your acquaintance.”
She keeps mumbling:
“Honestly... What gives with that hero? The game was perfect for the target demographic. Was it the feet ads? Or the gameplay loop? The only rational thing is… he hates ads...”
“Yeah, it sounds impossible, but when you factor in his anger every time he finishes a dungeon—”
She goes on:
“That damned domhag with her narcissistic BS. Always with the pay pig this, feet that. Die in a ditch.”
“That idiot who destroyed her orb—we had valuable data! She could’ve mitigated the acquisition if she’d followed protocol!”
“That lazy-ass metal stick, doing QA and still somehow botching the hero poaching plan!”
“At least the CEO is nice to me, but her tolerance for those idiots is going to be our downfall...”
Damn... She’s venting hard, am I really supposed to be hearing all this?
She sighs again:
“Now I have to go to this goddamned wasteland of an adspace to check the progress on Project—”
My ears perk up.
My senses are tingling.
Could it be...?
No. Don’t get your hopes up.
She looks off into the distance and smiles sadly:
“It was nice to have someone to listen to me... for once in my life.”
Then, dramatically, she walks to the bow of the ship and does that pose from Titanic.
The hell is she doing?
I leave her to it.
“Please take care of yourself better,” I say.
She flashes me a brilliant smile.
And for a flicker of a second…
a heart-shaped tail glows pink.
“Ara, ara, dear… You know hugging random girls is a really bad habit.”
I’m now on my knees in front of Caladblock with my hands raised in surrender.
“I couldn’t help it! Office workers need hugs too!” I protest with conviction.
She pouts:
“Don’t do it again. We’ll call it even.”
“No promises.”
BONK — she hits me with miasma.
Then Whalescalibur says:
“You know that girl wasn’t human, right?”
“She wasn’t?? Then why weren’t you trembling near her?”
“Because she was pitiful. Reminded me of someone…”
She flashes a cash sign over her head.
Ahhh… the empathy of kindred spirits.
Suddenly, a knock at my cabin door.
The Saintess stands there… holding a bottle of sunscreen.
SLAM!
I try to close the door.
Its to late, her foot is blocking the door frame.
“I’m not doing this...”
She smirks:
“You owe me. You didn’t fulfill your promise naughty hero~”
She makes a suggestive grabbing gesture.
God damn this thirsty elf baba.
I am dragged by my legs to the pool area of this luxury boat.
This elf is TOO STRONK.