“I will probably lose my job for this. Don’t you dare die.” Amanda said over a sigh.

  “Thank you.” I answered, I was now laying face down in the back of her car.

  “I guess, we will have to go to my house then.” Amanda spoke roughly. She started the car and I began to relax.

  I began to think about my situation, which led me to a question.

  “What does my back look like?”

  “Let’s just say that it doesn’t look like a back.” Abby said carefully. However her answer only made me more curious. I felt comfortable in my position and knew moving would only hurt, so I stayed still.

  I focused on my breathing, which was rough, and concentrated as much as I could. I tried to control the unusual unevenness and breaks in my breathing.

  Fortunately, my deep concentration helped me pass the time, and soon enough we found ourselves in a small neighborhood. Amanda slowed the car down, being careful of any jolts or bumps, and pulled into a driveway.

  The driveway led to a small parking lot which held about a dozen cars. Next to the parking lot was a big building with many doors up and down flights of stairs. While the building was big, with the number of occupants it would be little space for each of them.

  “Is this your house?” I asked.

  “How are you still conscious?” Amanda asked while completely ignoring my question.

  I in turn ignored her question, I could not let my guard down yet. While I trusted Amanda and Abby, I hadn’t told them something important.

  “Let's go.” I said while slowly pushing myself up. I gritted my teeth from the pain and was able to get to my feet.

  “Why do you do this?” Abby said exasperated. “We are going to have to carry you anyway.” To which Amanda nodded in agreement.

  Carefully the two supported me to Amanda’s ‘house’, which was on the third floor.

  Amanda opened the door, and a cold wind came from the other side. Her apartment reminded me of my father’s house, it was always cold and unwelcoming.

  I was carried to a bed and laid face down, suddenly the lights flickered on. Amanda ran around the house, supposedly collecting items to be used for my treatment.

  “I don’t have too much here, actually a normal first aid kit should work…” she suddenly paused, she was holding something back.

  “What? It’s okay, just tell me.” I responded.

  “I only have normal painkillers, I will be able to treat you… but it will hurt like hell.” She said very seriously.

  The narrative has been taken without permission. Report any sightings.

  “Didn’t I say I was prepared to fight from hello?” I asked.

  “But-” She started.

  I interrupted with, “It hurt when I got shot but I did not give up. I am telling you again, I can not go to a hospital.” Amanda considered for a moment.

  “Why do you go this far?” She asked.

  “I need to go to school tomorrow.” I answered with a slight smile.

  “Are you kidding me?” she asked while handing over the painkillers.

  “I really need to go to school.” I replied with a more serious look.

  “Why?” she asked, and I knew she was thinking about something more deeply.

  “There is somebody at school.” I replied.

  “Somebody you need to protect?” she asked in response. Making an assumption about my motives.

  “No, there are people I need to protect, but this is one I need to destroy.” I replied with a cold look in my eyes.

  “Destroy?” Amanda asked curiously, but her hands were preparing something skillfully.

  “Yes.” I replied coldly.

  “Why?” She asked again.

  “He is evil.” I replied.

  “No, I mean why can you go this far?” She asked. I felt something coming from her, a pit stuck deep in her heart. A sudden sympathy came from me, and I thought, was she lost?

  “Because there is nothing.” I gave my answer.

  “Nothing?” Amanda was obviously unsatisfied with my answer.

  “When I look around me I see nothing. There is no path, no ordained good or evil. When you look far enough everything becomes empty. When you leave your emotions behind you become inhuman. When you fall into the abyss there is nothing.” I said slowly but nobody dared interrupt a single word. I spoke seriously and from experience. Amanda fell silent and she looked at me with eyes that seemed so desperate. They were asking me for an answer, and to end her suffering.

  “What are you talking about?” Abby asked, very obviously confused.

  I decided to continue my rant at least for Amanda’s sake. “In the abyss there is nothing around you. It feels like freedom, but you slowly become hollow and inhuman. Others become tools, a mere means to your end. However you have no desires, because you are not a human anymore. You have no ends.” Every word carried a special momentum to it.

  “How do you get out of the abyss?” Amanda asked while avoiding eye contact.

  “First you have to want to be human.” I said. Suddenly I heard a noise come from Amanda’s direction. It was boiling water, and I don’t think Amanda was one to make tea in a time like this.

  The hot water was likely needed to clean my wounds, but I could tell it would hurt greatly to scrub my back.

  Amanda was still entirely immersed in my words so I decided to continue.

  “To get out of the abyss is seemingly a hard thing to do. The Abyss is empty, nothing to grab and reach for direction. However the abyss is not entirely empty.” I pointed painfully at Amanda. Amanda looked behind her and noticed the boiling water, which she took off the stove. She carefully prepared the rest of her equipment.

  She stared at the boiling water, then at me, and at the boiling water again.

  “There is no water in the abyss. YOU, you are the thing that is in the abyss. You can only rely on yourself to crawl out.” I said slightly frustrated.

  I could tell that Amanda was in deep thought. She was struggling with her heart, and her professional tendencies.

  “Just remember, nobody else can make you human, nor can they take away your humanity. You belong to yourself and nobody else.” These were the final words I had before the upcoming tortuous healing session.

  However, Amanda could not start until the water cooled down, so we sat in silence. Both of them were thinking about my words in their own way.

  Eventually, Amanda handed me a clean rag. Which I shoved in my mouth.