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I am all in

  Back in the room of Shoshana and Tamar.

  “Are you alright?” Tamar asked. “It looks like you were shocked from the kiss.”

  “I was. He told me he loved me.”

  “I may be wrong, but I was right there and I am sure he did not tell you he loved you. What I saw was you kiss him with your hand on his cheeks. So I don’t know how he told you he loved you.”

  Shoshana took a breath. “Okay, he did not use the words ‘I love you.’ He used the words ‘I am all in.’ You can ask Iona—he heard it.”

  “Okay, I will call Iona and let him tell me.”

  She just shook her head, thinking I am missing something.

  Tamar dialed her brother. “Okay, how is Tzuriel? I got a lovesick girl over here.”

  “I think I could say the same. What I see is him staring up at the ceiling.”

  “Would you believe that Shoshana just told me that Thomas said he loved her when they kissed and that was the reason she stumbled backwards?”

  Iona paused. “Well, that would do it, but Thomas has not said a word since he was in the water.”

  “Okay, I wonder why she said that. No, it was not the words ‘I love you,’ but the words ‘I am all in’ and you saw it.”

  “Did you talk to mom about the choice I would give Thomas while in the mikvah?”

  “No, I have been busy staying with Shoshana. So I didn’t know there would be anything other than a dip in the water.”

  “My friend I had with me was a mohel. So I could give him the opportunity. I told him my preference, but told him it was his choice in the end. So he asked if it was like half in or all in. Then he said that he was all in.”

  “Are you sure that is what he said? I can’t believe she said you heard him. What kind of kiss was that?”

  “I promise mom would not talk about the option—to give him time to fully comprehend what he did. But I feel better that he really is part of the family now.”

  “What, we got five hours to let those two interact. How about you see if you can bring Tzuriel here and see if they will tell us anything?”

  A few minutes later, Thomas and Iona entered the room. Thomas hopped on the other bed in the room that Shoshana was not laying on.

  “I have a small question. I know I wanted to ask in the room, but I wanted to see both your responses. So when you kissed Tzuriel, he told you he loved you?”

  They both responded in unison: “Yes.”

  Tamar shook her head. “I am not sure how they are doing it, but I am starting to feel like my little sister and her boyfriend are messing with us.”

  “I would agree, but I am sure there couldn’t have been any way for them to communicate beforehand. So Tzuriel, what is going on?”

  Thomas met his eyes. “I really do not know. I was just feeling that I loved her. I felt the acceptance in the room and had pictured in my mind what I said to Iona.”

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  “That really muddies the waters. May I ask why you are not closer?”

  Shoshana smiled gently. “I think we are close enough.”

  Iona sighed. “All we can do is keep them out of trouble, if they make that easy for us. What can we do?”

  A few minutes later, after watching them lay there on separate beds and smile, Iona stood.

  “I want to go ask dad something. I’ll be back before dinner.”

  The door clicked shut behind Iona.

  For three full heartbeats the room was perfectly still.

  Then Shoshana rolled onto her side, facing Thomas across the narrow aisle between the beds. He mirrored her without thinking, like their bodies already shared the same gravity.

  Shoshana’s voice was barely a breath. “Hi.”

  Thomas smiled, small and crooked. “Hi.”

  Another beat. Neither of them blinked.

  “You okay?”

  “I’ve never been more okay in my life.”

  Her eyes glistened. “Same.”

  They lapsed back into silence, but it wasn’t empty. It was the kind of silence that hums, like the air itself is singing in a frequency only they can hear.

  Shoshana lifted her hand, let it dangle off the edge of her mattress, palm up. Thomas reached out from his bed and did the same. Their fingertips stopped a single centimeter apart, trembling with the effort of not closing the gap.

  Shoshana whispered, “I can feel you from here.”

  Thomas’s voice was rough. “I know. It’s… loud.”

  She laughed once, soft and wet. “It’s the best kind of loud.”

  From the hallway they heard Tamar’s muffled voice on the phone, half-laughing, half-panicked: “Abba, I’m telling you, something supernatural is happening in there. No, I’m not exaggerating—”

  Shoshana’s eyes flicked toward the door, then back to Thomas. She mouthed, They’re never going to leave us alone now.

  Thomas mouthed back, Good.

  Her whole face lit up. She scooted a fraction closer to the edge of her bed—so little it was almost nothing, but Thomas felt it like a tidal pull. He mirrored it. Another centimeter gone. Their fingertips were almost brushing now.

  “Tzuriel.”

  He swallowed. “Yeah?”

  “I’m all in, too.”

  The words weren’t loud, but they landed between them like the final piece of a puzzle clicking into place. Something in the room shifted—soft gold light from the window seemed to brighten, the air felt warmer, sweeter.

  Thomas’s eyes shone. “I know.”

  They stayed like that—hands almost touching, hearts wide open—until the shadows stretched long across the floor and the call for dinner finally echoed down the hall.

  Neither of them had moved more than a few inches.

  They didn’t need to.

  They were already home.

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