The Human

  He took a small sample of my blood the next evening. As usual, he licked the puncture instead of applying a bandage. My captor offered to catch urine for me, too. Fuck going through that, again. I had one of two choices, so I peed in the cup. Apparently, I’d need to do this somewhat often going forward. Great. I was also on four meds a day, now. Am I just a test subject for him? What are he and his doctors hoping to find out, exactly?

  “They also want a sample of your shit.”

  …My shit? “That’s not happening.”

  “They gave me some things to get it myself, if I gotta. I think one of them’s used for dogs.”

  Fuck you. Both options are invasive. “Why does any of this fucking matter?” I didn’t wait for an answer; I went to shower and hoped he left for the night by the time I finished.

  Halfway through, the tile started vibrating softly under my feet, the same way you might feel the vibrations from another car’s stereo system while waiting at a stoplight.

  Once dry, I slid into the pair of black joggers that waited on the counter. The floor continued to vibrate and there was an occasional rattle of glass on the shelves. As I brushed my hair, I examined the shirt he set out. It was a suspiciously bright yellow and both the sleeves and half of the top were missing. Black letters across the front read, ‘CAUTION: WILL BITE.’ Your idea of a joke? Yeah, I’m not fucking wearing this. I left the top on the counter.

  He was typing something into his phone and glanced up as I left the bathroom. Fuck, you’re still here.

  “I thought you might hate that one,” he tried, and failed, to hide his amusement, “so I picked out a separate option for you.”

  He tossed a black shirt at me, which I let hit me and fall to the ground. My captor pocketed his phone and got to his feet, grabbing the top from the ground and forcing it over my head. It actually had sleeves and he pulled my arms through them. But, it was just as short as the yellow shirt and exposed my midriff. I hate this.

  “I’m gonna check out the party. We are, actually - you’re going.”

  I glanced down at what I was wearing then glared at him. “In this?”

  “Your outfit wasn’t a problem when you ran away.”

  The flowery briefs and shirt you set out for me that day? That’s not the same fucking thing. His eyebrows raised as though he invited me to debate him and I sighed instead. I’d actually prefer going out topless over wearing this… could this even be called a shirt? I removed it on our way to the door.

  “Put it back on.” He stood still and didn’t even turn to look at me.

  “You said there’s ‘always another option.’” You said I didn’t have to wear the pink briefs that day.

  He was now facing me, standing as imposingly as he could manage. “But did I say your option would be consequence-free?”

  “You didn’t say it wasn’t.” I mocked his expression from earlier, raising my eyebrows in an exaggerated manner as I waited for his counter-argument.

  He briefly appeared irritated then started to chuckle. “I’ll agree to that and let this slide. I might even ignore the attitude you just gave me, as a freebie.”

  How generous of you.

  “It’s in your best interest to put the shirt back on. I’d have more fun if you didn’t.”

  The last time he warned me about making things fun for him, he slammed me down on the hood of my car and bit me. I threw the stupid shirt back on then followed him out of the apartment.

  He was ahead of me as we went down the stairs and the sound of metal bumping against metal drew my attention to his back pocket. Handcuffs. Why do you need handcuffs?

  I could’ve heard it from the apartment had I listened closer, but outside the sounds of music and shouting were far more apparent. We jogged through the neighborhood for over a mile and the noise and earth-shaking bass grew louder as we approached its source: an apartment complex with enough growth around it to suggest it had been abandoned for years.

  Bright lights flashed through the busted front doors and windows. I could see partially down a hallway; it was so packed with people that they spilled out onto the street. There were drinks in hands and people were moving and jumping to the beat. If we’re going in, I can use this chaos to disappear. How well will he hear, see, or smell me among all of this? A handcuff closed around my right wrist and he fastened the other to his left. Fuck…

  “Don’t wanna lose ya.” I barely made out what my captor said over the volume.

  A bar was set up at what used to be the lobby’s front desk. A large display board was balanced on a counter behind them with a numbered menu, and ‘CASH ONLY’ in big bold letters across the bottom. Nothing about this appeared organized – it was meant to be quick. The vampire held up two fingers and he exchanged payment for a drink in a clear plastic cup. He handed it to me and I shook my head.

  I don’t drink. I don’t want anything that might affect my judgement in my system. The look he gave me was clear, though – my captor wasn’t offering it to me, he was telling me to drink it. I knew I’d hate it before it even touched my lips. It was some sort of flavored vodka, a fruity choice that did it zero favors and it was hard to get down. He added the empty cup to a trash bin that was already starting to overflow and pulled me deeper into the lobby.

  Traveling anywhere in this crowd required us to squeeze between moving bodies. We dodged arms that were pumping and punching in the air but weren’t as successful with gyrating hips. The body heat and sweat contained within the space created its own suffocating climate. My captor kept me close but was enjoying himself; he danced with a group of what seemed to be friends.

  Almost everyone at this event was high on life, party drugs, and/or dehydrated delirium. The vampire must’ve been somewhere like this the night he returned drunk. I’d glanced away for a bit to get an idea of how packed this place actually was; he was kissing one of the men in the group when my attention returned to him, and one of the women stood behind him with her hands up the front of his shirt. A second man had his hands down the front of his pants.

  Some of the other groups around us seemed inspired by their activity, and for once I’d rather be back at the apartment. Every time I returned my attention to him, the scene in front of me had gotten worse. And, being handcuffed to my captor, I could only stand so far away.

  The woman still stood behind him, rubbing her body against his back while she groped his chest and stomach. He was on the hairier side and she seemed obsessed. The man who’d had his hands down my captor’s pants now knelt in front of him, his dick in his mouth – what he could fit of it, at least. A new woman was standing behind this man and kissing the vampire; the man who had been kissing him was behind her, his hands playing with her chest while he fucked her from behind. My attention returned to my captor. The hand I wasn’t attached to disappeared between the new woman’s thighs, that arm propped against the back of the man giving head.

  The music was starting to blend into the lights. There’s no fucking way just vodka could do this, so what did I drink? I need to get out of here before I can’t. I glanced around. I could undo the cuff and put it on the wrist of the woman behind him, maybe. With all he has going on, would he notice if there suddenly wasn’t any resistance?

  The cuff was clamped tight around my wrist and I needed a way to unlock it. A pin in a nearby woman’s hair caught my eye and I removed it as inconspicuously as I could manage in this crowded space. She reached for her hair but was over it quickly.

  Before I could use it to work at my cuffs, hands grabbed my cheeks and someone’s lips met mine. Not the vampire’s – the hands were too warm and our wrists were still attached. I dropped the pin into my pocket as the stranger worked their tongue into my mouth and with it, more than just saliva. Something thick, something… They pulled away and I got a better look at them; it was the man who’d just been kneeling in front of.. Oh no…

  My captor traded places with the man and grabbed my lower jaw. He tilted my head back like did the night I bit his tongue, his way of telling me to swallow what was in my mouth. I tried to get out of his grip, instead; I just needed a few seconds so I could spit it out. The group seemed invested in this playing out and one of the men now stood behind me, sandwiching me between him and the vampire. I felt the bass through their bodies.

  This man pulled my joggers down, then my briefs. His hands were on my butt-cheeks and he was positioning himself behind me. Was this the vampire’s way of punishing me? If I do what he wants, will he call the other guy off? I swallowed and he released me, but I was still trapped between him and the man behind me who was trying to keep me still. I had nowhere to go and whatever I drank was hitting me hard. Everything echoed – sight, sounds, smell, touch.

  I tried to determine the man’s height from how his breath fell on my neck. I was normally a good shot but it took me longer to feel confident about my aim in my altered state. Now or maybe never. I successfully jabbed my elbow into this man’s throat and sent him stumbling back. I stepped closer to the vampire and hid my back against him as well as I could with our linked arms until I could fix my bottoms.

  The man held his throat and I watched him cough until he could breathe properly again; his dick was still out and he, furious, looked between me and the vampire behind me. My captor wrapped his arm around me and rested his chin on my shoulder. He gestured to the man to come back to us and, likely due to whatever drugs he had on board, the idiot complied. I don’t know what you’re doing but he’s not touching me again.

  They started kissing with me once again tightly trapped between them. Both of them were hard and they made sure I knew it. The vampire’s lips traveled down to the guy’s neck and my heart rate jumped as I anticipated what was coming. He lingered briefly before he pulled away, blood pouring down that side of the man’s neck. He bit him, as I expected, but moved to the other side of his neck to feed from there instead.

  I couldn’t force myself to look away from his neck, the hunger that was starting to become familiar rising as I stared. I closed my eyes to try to suppress this growing need. My mouth began to water and my heart rate continued to increase. I felt this hunger the night he tortured Paul’s man in the apartment, too. Is blood what I keep craving?

  The man’s neck was closer each time I opened my eyes – I was the one leaning in. You have to fight it. My lips made contact with his now wet skin. I dragged my tongue up the side of his neck and swallowed what I collected. Resist it. I placed my mouth over the punctures and it was quickly filled by his warm blood. I couldn’t stop myself, I needed it, and I relaxed more with each swallow. It was so… soothing.

  Yells vibrated in his throat, against my lips, but were drowned out by the music. The bass practically swam through my veins at our ground-zero proximity, but we may as well have been in an empty room the way everything else around us began to fade deep into the background.

  The vampire cupped my chin and, as gently as he’s ever touched me, turned my head away from the man’s neck. He lifted the man over his shoulder then held my cuffed hand. We cut through the crowd to the other side of the packed lobby and turned down another hall that led outside. The body was tossed behind a row of overgrown bushes and, with his hands now empty, his attention returned to me.

  I knew I was messy – the light wind was cold where blood was still drying on my face and neck. He only had a little blood at the corners of his mouth. I’ve killed before, as was needed to complete a job or in self defense. This man was a stranger whose only crime was misreading the situation. Forcing my elbow into his throat probably exceeded a reasonable response as it was. I not only helped the vampire kill him, I drank his blood. And, as much as I wanted to deny it, I liked it. What’s wrong with me?

  My captor backed me against the building and started to lick the blood from my skin; he cleaned a patch on my cheek then kissed my lips. I gasped when his lips and tongue moved to my neck, his efforts intensifying as he noticed the way my body reacted to him. Between this and whatever was currently in my system, I was having a hard time staying on my feet.

  He opened his fly then pinned me against the wall with his hips. It was just his thin boxers, my light joggers, my briefs, and the friction from him rocking his hips between us. And his sweet, earthy scent. The vampire moved to the right side of my neck and the sensation restarted just as strongly. I was going to come and, on my very empty list, he was still the last person I wanted to bring me to or over that edge. He knew exactly how he was affecting me and I came as soon as he sank his teeth in my shoulder.

  He slowly released his bite. His eyes met mine, and he looked so proud of himself for what he just did to me. I was uncuffed and he held me close, his lips softly kissing my forehead. I wanted to hate his forced intimacy as much as I hated him but I was calm. It wasn’t just from the substances he’d put in me. His embrace, his scent, had a way of calming me, even when I wanted to be angry. I’m so fucking mixed up...

  My captor tapped my shoulder after an indeterminate amount of time and I looked up at him. “Time to go home,” he mouthed. The music still drowned out the sound.

  He led me through two fences to get back to the front of the building; the first had nothing securing it and the second had a chain and lock. The vampire broke the lock easily by giving it a sharp tug, then briefly studied the chain before he dropped it to the ground. I kept a hand on the back of his shoulder as we walked, feeling like gravity could pull me into the grass face first at any moment. His phone was in hand and he interacted with something on the screen. Ordering a ride?

  “M!” a voice called from behind us.

  We had walked far enough from the music that I heard the shout, and I knew it was Paul before I turned around. The vampire didn’t kill him? After what he did to the man P hired, why wouldn’t he have taken out the source? I normally had excellent balance but turning around as quickly as I did caused me to stumble backward into my captor. Paul already had his attention.

  “Who’s this?” The question seemed directed at me but he didn’t take his eyes off of Paul. He wrapped a tense arm around me like he had within the crowd and pulled me close. I wasn't going to answer; whatever he learned about Paul tonight wouldn’t come from me.

  The two men were similar in height, build, and confidence. Anyone that met them without knowing anything else would find them equally threatening as they stared each other down. But if they were to fight, the vampire would destroy Paul.

  “I got your message you fuckin’ prick.”

  What message? Are they communicating? Negotiating?

  “Can’t handle him unless you’ve drugged him?” Paul continued. “Did he get too vicious for you? Try to kill ya one too many times?”

  My captor shook with laughter behind me and Paul became visibly angrier. “What’d you give him this time? E?”

  Who is E? No, it's what – Ecstasy. And what did he mean by ‘this time?’ I realized he must be talking about our visit to The Diner – I wasn’t drugged then, he’d just taken so much of my blood.

  “Among other things.”

  I wasn’t surprised, I knew it wasn’t just alcohol. Whatever was in there hit fast but was also wearing off quickly. I was sweating heavily now but the vertigo was gone.

  “Let’s go somewhere a little quieter to talk, P.”

  “Nah, here’s fine.”

  Don’t be difficult, he’ll make you regret it. “Go home, P. I’ll be okay.” Please don’t make this worse for either of us.

  “Have you looked in a fuckin’ mirror? You’re not okay now, M!” He pulled one of his guns out and aimed it at us. “I’m taking you with me!”

  You’re going to end up just like Willie. “Don’t!” I raised my arms and backed up more. “Leave while you still can.” The vampire wrapped his other arm around me and pulled me in tight.

  Paul looked offended. “You- you’re protecting him, M?”

  More shaking from behind me. “He’s protecting you.”

  “Lower the gun, P, you don’t know w-!” My mouth was covered. You don’t know what you’re up against.

  “Let him make his own decisions. He’s a big boy.” He moved his hand to my shoulder.

  And? I’m a big boy. I want to make my own decisions.

  Paul continued to aim at us. “Let M go and we’ll forget about this, no trouble.”

  “Oh, I love trouble.” He spoke in the same tone he had when he was standing at my car, and when Willie was yelling at him. Taunting. Aggressive. Playful.

  I wouldn’t get a chance to talk to Paul alone so I had to try here. Will he let Paul answer? Will Paul tell me the truth if he knows it, especially if they’re in some sort of talks already? His reaction might at least tell me if I’ve got the right idea.

  “Did C hire him?”

  Paul looked genuinely confused, then upset. I felt a squeeze on my shoulder, gentler than how he usually applied pressure when he didn’t like what I was doing.

  “Is that what this guy’s been tellin’ ya?”

  No one’s told me shit, that’s the problem. “Why am I here?” Why is any of this fucking happening? Paul hesitated and looked between me and the vampire. Maybe he’s afraid to say anything that could be sensitive. That, or, he doesn’t want to betray Charles.

  “We still don’t know why he took ya.” I didn’t see any of Paul’s tells. “But… we saw what happened with Beth. If that took him ten minutes, I…we…”

  Fuck, they think I’m a liability. Wouldn’t I, in their shoes?

  “M, how much info have you given him?”

  Nothing. Fucking nothing. But that’s exactly what someone trying to save their ass would say. They’d want to know what I said to him and I had nothing to give them.

  “M, I don’t got a lotta choices here.” He had two: get me out of here, or kill me. Paul was sent as damage control.

  Could it really be that simple, that I ran into the wrong person at the wrong time? If everything the vampire’s said to me has been the truth, that’s even more fucked than I thought. He wants me. He wants to kill me. He considers me his – a possession.

  Meaning, this outcome would be why he took me back to the Diner. My captor has hinted that he knows my line of work. He must’ve put enough together that he knew how to get his performance in front of the right people. All of this was an elaborate effort to make sure I had nothing and no one outside of him. “Aim for my head so I don’t have to watch him kill you.” At least the vampire won’t get the pleasure of killing me himself.

  I was pushed to the ground at the same time the gun went off. When I looked back up, the bullet meant for me had hit the vampire’s shoulder where my head had just been. Paul hadn’t hesitated.

  “Lower your gun.” I hadn’t even noticed they made eye contact but he now had Paul locked in. Paul fought the command, his arm tense as he dropped it to his side. “Actually, be just as good for me and put your gun to your head, instead. Keep it there ‘til I tell ya you can move it.”

  Paul couldn't break their eye contact himself; his eyes were wide and there was a small tremble in the hand that held the gun. The vampire did, though, as pulled me to my feet and stood between Paul and me. Paul realized that he had regained most of his freedom and stepped toward us, angrily trying to move the gun away from his skull.

  The more you fight him, the more he’ll toy with you.

  “How’d you fuckin’–!” Paul started.

  “Stop where you are and listen.” The vampire must’ve gotten hold of him again, as Paul did as he was told. “He’s in control of everything he says and does around me. I can’t do this to Michael, it doesn’t work.”

  I wish you’d let me be in control of myself.

  There was a small hole in the back of his shirt, behind the shoulder – the shot was a through-and-through. I lifted the back of his shirt to get a better look. Blood trailed all the way down to the back of his pants, but the wound itself had already mostly healed. It looked like it could have happened months ago instead of in the last five minutes. I dropped the shirt and returned my attention to Paul.

  “Before Elizabeth told me his name, I thought it was Marcus. Willie let me know that a P existed. Michael never told me your name or anything else about you.”

  What is he doing?

  “And, until five minutes ago, I didn’t know there was a C.”

  “Why’d ya leave with him, then?” Paul glanced between me and the gun against his temple; it was clearly making him nervous. “Why stay?”

  “Do you know him at all?”

  Do you know me?

  “He was gonna come home with me one way or another. He walked out with me so no one else got hurt. Hard to say why he stays. Could be the lesson he learned that night, or because he knows I’ll find him wherever he goes. Maybe he stays because he finally accepts that he’s mine.”

  I don’t fucking belong to you.

  “But mostly, I think he stays to protect you. Because if he leaves again, he knows who I’ll go to first.”

  This whole time, I let myself believe that I’d been caught during a job, or that my team would do something like this to me.

  “He’s been protecting you this entire time and you almost blew his brains out.”

  We wouldn’t all be here right now if it wasn’t for you. But my captor wasn’t wrong. I’d been very careful about the information I gave to him and they – Charles and Paul, maybe Beth, too – were willing to formally cut ties assuming otherwise. We’re all just making assumptions based on the information we have and he’s been sitting in the middle of this chaos enjoying the show. Even if he lets me go, home can never be the same. I’ll never be the same.

  “Aw, shit, Mikey…”

  “Whatever he’s protecting, you don’t have to worry. I don’t care about what you do or who you work for. I care about him.”

  You have a shitty way of showing it.

  “Tell ‘C,’ if that’s who’s in charge, whatever version of this you have to. He hasn’t betrayed anything. But, he belongs to me now. If I see you again, I’ll gladly give C the same message I gave you.”

  What fucking message?

  “Before we leave, what’s your name, P?”

  I should’ve seen that question coming.

  “...Paul.”

  “Can’t say it was nice to meet you, Paul. Put the gun away, then you’re free to leave. I recommend you go home, but what you do next is up to you.”

  Leave. Don’t be an idiot, Paul.

  “You started all of this, ya piece of shit.”

  Paul’s temper is why I was sent into the field most of the time. This didn’t need to go any further. The vampire was letting Paul leave without a scratch – or bite – and he was talking himself out of it. You have to get out of here. “Tell C I’m dead.”

  “That’s it? You’re givin’ up?”

  I’m trying to make sure you go home tonight. Alive. “If I were C, I wouldn’t believe me. He’ll want an explanation that I don’t have for him.”

  “Then it’s a good thing you’re not C, ya paranoid idiot.”

  “Your life isn’t worth two or three weeks of mine. You had no choice but to kill me. The details are your problem.” I started to walk back toward the event.

  “No ‘good-bye?!’”

  I didn’t turn around. “You already said it when you took a shot at my head. I’m dead, I can’t say good-bye.” I’m dead anyway without my monthly injections. Tick, tock, tick, tock.

  The vampire’s hand wrapped around mine.

  We took a car back to his apartment so he could feed on the driver – he didn’t want to wake up extra hungry because he had to heal a gunshot wound, he said.

  I headed to the bathroom as soon as we got in the door. The pin was still in my pocket and I needed time to hide it; I didn’t want to find out what my captor would do to me if he knew I had it. Tonight's events also left me feeling filthy and I couldn’t wait to wash it off. I left my hair in the braid this time and got to work on scrubbing the party off of my skin. I was half done when his arms wrapped around me from behind. How’d you get in here so quietly?

  The vampire gave me a squeeze then got to work on cleaning himself. He usually waited to shower until the end of the night and this was probably why. I looked him over while I rinsed off – any evidence that he’d been shot earlier was completely gone. How do you do that? I didn’t realize I had nothing clean to change until I stepped out to dry off.

  He got out soon after me. “We’re gonna talk before the night ends.”

  “Can we talk while wearing clothes?”

  “No.” My captor tried to come across as serious but there was a hint of his usual smirk. “I’ll give you something to wear after, and what I pick out for you will be determined by how this chat goes.”

  The outfit you made me wear out today wasn’t punishment enough?

  He pulled the towel off of my waist and tossed it in the hamper, then placed a hand on my back to lead me out of the bathroom.

  “Where am I sitting?” If I chose, he’d move me anyway. Every time. It was like he tried to determine what would make me the most uncomfortable based on the first choice I made.

  The vampire lifted me under the back and knees and sat in a chair, laying me across him at an angle; my head was against his left shoulder, my butt dropped onto the chair between his legs, and my legs were stretched over his right thigh.

  “Where else?”

  Of course, how silly of me to ask.

  “If I’m sitting down, this is where you sit,” my captor added, and rested his hand on my leg.

  “We’ll see.”

  He gave my thigh a hard smack. “You’ll see,” he growled against my ear. “You almost died today.”

  Better luck next time. “Isn’t that the goal?”

  “Only if I’m the one killing you. And only when I’m ready.”

  Great. Until then, I’m stuck with you.

  “I already know you tried to get me to kill you the night you had the panic attack.”

  Oh, you noticed? “I was still coming down from the disappointment that I wasn’t having a heart attack.”

  “I’m usually amused when I don’t know if you’re being sarcastic or serious, but this isn’t one of those times.”

  I sighed. What he said to Paul was so spot on, yet he could seem so oblivious when we had conversations like this. “Given all you’ve put me through, why would I think anything you say to me is more than manipulation meant to keep me compliant until you’re done with me?”

  “You’re so quiet that I didn’t realize exactly where your mind was these days. But, as I’ve told you before, I’ve never lied to you, Michael.”

  “Can you understand why I wouldn’t believe that? I could’ve told them everything I thought I knew about you when I escaped. So, why would I think you'd risk saying anything that could hurt you if I escape again?”

  “Yes, why would I? I meant what I said earlier. What we have going on may not be conventional, but I care about you.”

  Is there such a thing as a conventional kidnapping? “Is this how you show people you care?”

  “This?” My captor smacked my thigh again. “I wouldn’t know, I can’t remember the last time I felt this way about someone.”

  Neither can I. I’ve never hated someone as much as I hate you.

  “You asked Paul if C hired me? Hired me to do what, exactly?”

  I could answer this question without giving anything away, and he wasn’t trying to force it out of me. Not yet, at least. “I thought they sent you to break me. About what? Your guess would be as good as mine. There’s nothing I wouldn’t have told them if I had the answer. And if it wasn’t C that hired you, I thought you might work for someone from the job I was on, or a completed one.”

  He cackled softly. “I came to break you all on my own.” The vampire’s breath started to hit the back of my neck. “Paul said something interesting.” Under different circumstances, I’d suggest he didn’t say that to Paul – his ego was already massive enough. “He seemed certain you’ve tried to kill me already. So, is killing people a habit of yours?”

  I don’t want to fucking talk about this. “Are you asking about my body count?” Another hard smack on the thigh.

  “Do I have to worry about you?”

  Yes. “I’ll kill you the first chance I get.” I mean it.

  He chuckled under me. “You’ve had many chances already, haven’t you?”

  Have there been opportunities you were worried I’d take? “I want to be sure you actually die.”

  “Good thing you haven’t learned any of my weaknesses, yet.”

  The sun has to be one of them. You don’t go out during the day and your apartment’s windows are all thick and heavily tinted. What does it do to you?

  “Though, I know some of yours,” the vampire added, then kissed my neck. I knew he would only escalate if I told him to stop. “I fantasize about how I’m going to kill you.”

  Don’t worry, you’ve made that very clear.

  “You’ve earned something quick but I don’t like that ending for either of us. I like to imagine what you’d look like while I’m doing it and when I’m done. Your body has been my canvas since I brought you home; nothing’s been more visually captivating to me than you after I’ve finished my latest work.” He squeezed the bruise forming on my thigh where he’d been hitting the same spot and I winced. The vampire buried his face against the back of my neck and took a long, deep breath. I was pulled tighter against him – he was getting worked up again and wanted me to know it. “I think about what you’ll smell like in that moment, and if the certainty of your death will carry a different taste.” He nipped at my shoulder.

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  You say you care about me but you’re so full of shit. This wasn’t going to stop on its own. I had to give him something else he wanted, instead, like a trade. “I knew what I was doing this time but I couldn’t stop myself.”

  My captor paused with a disappointed sigh, his needy breath hitting my skin. Finally he asked, “what was it like to be you in that moment?”

  “It was like the night Paul’s guy came to the apartment. I was hungry but this time I knew what I wanted. More than a craving, I needed his blood.”

  He moved his hand from my thigh to my stomach. “Any nausea or cramping?”

  “No, Doctor.” And, back to my thigh with another smack. I gasped this time, though this slap wasn’t any more heavy-handed than those before it.

  “Your body doesn’t process blood the way mine does, so let’s get some actual nutrition in your system and hope you keep everything down.”

  I was finally allowed to get up so we could move to the kitchen. My captor remained undressed while he made me something – fortunately, the island blocked most of my view. He threw most of the vegetables that remained in the fridge or pantry in the skillet with some oil then added some eggs once those had cooked through. The mixture was plated with flour tortillas, greek yogurt, and salsa.

  “I’m glad you joined me. Feeding on someone together like that is intimate.”

  Don’t say it like that, I wasn’t feeding. I don’t feed.

  “I want to have so many more moments like that with you.”

  I don’t want to find out what that means.

  The Vampire

  There were hundreds of people nearby. I had a general idea of where they were accumulating but there was nothing that should bring them to that corner of the neighborhood. Would P send an entire mob to retrieve Michael? I wasn’t able to make anything out at this distance – just a general buzz, like a hive. I didn’t let this distract me.

  “Hold still.” I used my thumb as a tourniquet and fed the needle into Michael’s vein. I glanced up at him between filling the tubes – he was angry but cooperative, and stared across the room to avoid acknowledging me. I pulled the needle and a small dot of blood quickly started growing. He glared at me when I licked it from his skin and I grinned at him. “They want some pee, too.” I handed a cup to him.

  He knew what I was gonna say and he tried me anyway: “They can keep wanting it.”

  You like our back and forth as much as I do, you just won’t say it. “I can help you if you’re having trouble peeing.” He groaned and took the cup before he disappeared into the bathroom. “They also want a sample of your shit,” I said, once he returned with the filled cup.

  “That’s not happening.”

  “They gave me some things to get it myself, if I gotta. I think one of them’s used for dogs.” Some plastic rod with a large oval loop at the end.

  He headed back to the bathroom. “Why does any of this fucking matter?” The door shut behind him and the shower started.

  Because my blood is doing something to you that’s led you to biting me in your sleep. As eager as I was for answers, the level of interest The Doctor had recently taken in Michael made me nervous. He said he hadn’t found anything new but had a few theories he wanted to explore – he even offered to take Michael again so he’d always be available to him. Samples and the occasional exam would have to be enough for him.

  Some sort of sound system was being tested by the bees; excited cheers joined their buzzing until they were mostly drowned out by the music. The sound grew in and the walls began to rattle from the intense bass. We’ve definitely gotta check this out…

  I didn’t need to change, my clothes looked nice and I could handle temperatures well. What Michael would pick for himself might be too hot for a human in such a space. I grabbed him light joggers – he might get too hot in jeans – and his choice of two crop tops. I’d offer the sleeveless yellow one that I’d very recently bought for him first, to break the ice. It said, ‘CAUTION: WILL BITE’ across it in black letters. If he actually wore it, great; if not, that’s what the back-up was for. I also pocketed a pair of handcuffs.

  The clothes waited for him on the counter and I used this down time to read through messages on my phone. It wasn’t a surprise when Michael came out in only the joggers. “I thought you might hate that one, so I picked out a separate option for you.”

  He didn’t even try to catch it when I tossed it over to him, just looked at me as though he dared me to do something about it. I did – I picked the shirt up and wrestled him into it. It had quarter sleeves but the torso portion ended just below his nipples. The look of disgust on his face? I was living for it.

  “I’m gonna check out the party. We are, actually - you’re going.”

  His lip curled in disgust. “In this?”

  Yes, in that. “Your outfit wasn’t a problem when you ran away.”

  How many people saw you in your underwear that night? Surely this is an improvement. He had nothing to say, and with that settled, we headed out. Rather, we started to until I heard him take the shirt off behind me.

  “Put it back on.”

  “You said there’s ‘always another option.’”

  Did I? I turned around. “But did I say your option would be consequence-free?”

  “You didn’t say it wasn’t.”

  I knew he was baiting me, he’d rather push my buttons until I punished him than have to wear that shirt. I thought it was a good look for him, and it took away the inconvenience of having to slide my hands up his shirt to pet his tummy. I will put these handcuffs on you now if I have to. Actually, no, that’ll slow us down. I’ll find a way to punish you after we get there, instead. Images of how that could go briefly flashed in my mind and I couldn’t stop myself from laughing at how he might react.

  “I’ll agree to that and let this slide. I might,” I won’t, “even ignore the attitude you just gave me, as a freebie. It’s in your best interest to put the shirt back on.” Don’t test me, Michael. “I’d have more fun if you didn’t.”

  He made sure I knew his disdain for the shirt the entire time he slipped back into it.

  I left Michael’s samples in a small cooler just on the inside of the building’s main entrance and we headed outside. It was easier to pinpoint the location of the noise once we were outside of our apartment’s reinforced walls. I wanted to keep wearing him out as much as I could until we got a better understanding of what was happening to him, so we went by foot.

  Turns out, there wasn’t a good shortcut to get there – the source was deep in the other side of the neighborhood and it took a little longer than I expected to get there. As it came into view, it was clear there were more people at this pop-up rave than I’d estimated.

  I turned to check in on Michael; the look on his face told me everything I needed to know and I quickly slapped one of the cuffs on his right wrist. I attached the other cuff to me so he couldn’t get far. “Don’t wanna lose ya.” Can you even hear me over the noise? I’d already turned off my own hearing, it was otherwise too sensitive to handle loud events like this.

  We passed a bar on our way in and I skimmed their options. Some basic shots, others mixed with party drugs. I’ve never seen Michael under any sort of influence. I bought a shot of vodka mixed with X and K and handed it to him. He protested but, after some convincing, drank it anyway. It probably tasted every bit as awful as his face suggested. I tossed the cup for him and we moved along.

  Everyone we passed seemed to be having a good time, but I was looking for something a bit more… specific. I found it in a small, mix-gendered group that danced closely to each other, with light kissing and petting. I slowly integrated myself into their space, but I didn’t need to; they were all so fucking high and accepted me immediately.

  Once I started to kiss one of the men, the energy in that corner of the room shifted. It was like being pulled into a herd of zombies – hands and mouths were everywhere and the mood spread through the crowd like a contagion. Someone new started to kiss me and my zipper came undone, a mouth tending to my now hard cock. The lips on mine belonged to a woman who now stood over the man who was sucking me off. I slipped my hand below and rubbed her clit, occasionally slipping my fingers inside her while a man behind her fucked her ass. I glanced at Michael, wishing it was his lips wrapped around me, his mouth I was about to cum inside. He was doing his best not to look at me at all.

  I gripped the man’s hair as I finished and tilted his head up to look at me. I touched his lips and pointed at Michael. “For him,” I mouthed. I zipped myself up as he got to his feet. It worked better than I expected; he held Michael’s head and forced him into a kiss. Michael’s face scrunched in disgust – he’d pieced together the order of events and knew what was in his mouth.

  I knew immediately I’d made a mistake. Those lips belong to me and next time I’ll cum in your mouth myself. I grabbed and raised Michael’s chin before he could spit it out and he tried to wriggle out of my grip. The Mouth I’d just fucked stepped up behind him and held Michael still; I’d deal with him in a moment. For now: swallow.

  Michael’s eyes widened and he stared pointedly at me with what almost looked like worry underneath the anger. Are the drugs hitting? He swallowed and I let go of his face immediately – he did what I wanted and I rewarded him by restoring some freedom. But, I liked having him this close, whether it was just the two of us or we were surrounded by an entire crowd. He continued his attempts to escape from between me and the man behind him. The way he looked at me – what are you trying to tell me?

  He suddenly stood still and stared straight ahead with a hazy focus. Then, faster than I’d seen him move before, Michael elbowed the man behind him. The way The Mouth clutched his neck and appeared to cough suggested he’d taken the blow to his windpipe. Michael turned away from the guy and backed against me, his ass hanging out of his pants until he pulled them up. The man’s hard cock was sticking out of his open fly.

  Fuck, you were worried. About him. Angry was a forgiving way to describe my sudden mood. I pulled Michael close. Protectively. Possessively. His ass belonged to me – I’m the only one allowed to fuck it. I wanted to kill his man. I wanted to be inside Michael and mark him as mine. I wanted to kill the man while being inside Michael.

  The Mouth seemed to have recovered and started dancing again. His fly was still wide open and he was too fucked up to care, possibly even remember, what just happened. I motioned for him to come back to us and he eagerly complied.

  I kissed the man first, as if I could erase what remnants of the previous kiss he still had on his lips – Michael’s lips are just for me. Then, I moved down to his neck – he enjoyed it until I bit him. Being handcuffed to Michael made that location awkward for me and I switched to the other side; The Mouth was screaming when I got a glimpse of him but the music was too loud for anyone to notice.

  I pressed my hips tight against Michael’s ass while I fed; when I replayed this event in my mind later, I’d be fucking it. He shifted to the side but didn’t try to get away this time; his warmth against my body as the man’s blood filled my mouth… Mmm. You are finally right where you were always meant to be. With me.

  The man’s pulse began to flutter rapidly against my lips and I knew he was getting close to death. I pulled away a moment later to see Michael’s face was hidden against the other side of The Mouth’s neck. Are you…? I observed him a little longer. You are! Michael’s mouth was over my first bite and he was feeding with me. Blood coated the lower half of his cheeks, his chin, his own neck. Oh fuck… my hungry little monster… I could take you here and now.

  I separated them and hoisted the man’s limp body over my shoulder. Michael’s hand in mine, we eventually made our way to the hall that led out back. I dumped the body behind some shrubs to free my hands and pulled Michael between the building and me. He was wearing my favorite look and this time he put it on himself. The man’s blood started to collect in Michael’s sweat; I licked some from his cheek then kissed his lips. Reclaimed his lips.

  Each time I kissed him, he pushed his lips against mine ever-so-slightly – he probably didn’t even know he was doing it, he looked at me in a way that told me the drugs had definitely taken effect. His hips pressed against mine when I moved to his neck.

  I unzipped, needed less between us. He was getting harder as I cleaned his neck and I rubbed my cock against his through our thin layers. We should be home where it’s just our sounds, our scents, our skin, my teeth, his neck. I wanted to mark him. Anyone who sees you should know that you’re mine. The wounds from my last bite had fully healed, not even a scar where I’d marked him previously.

  He was getting close. His chest was trapped against mine and I could feel his breathing change as I finished cleaning his neck. His body was tense and groans vibrated in his throat. I moved a little further, down to his shoulder, and was careful not to hit anything significant when I bit him. You’re mine and I’ll kill anyone who touches you. We will kill them together.

  He came for me for the first time and I needed to hold him. I undid the cuffs so I could wrap both arms around him. How much of your response is from the drugs? From my blood in your veins that acts like your own? I kissed his forehead and kept my lips against his skin. He was always so warm and I wanted to steal it for myself, to bathe in it.

  I thought about what I just watched inside. Did my blood make you do this? The Doctor was in very early stages of research. Why does my – or, more likely, any vampire’s – blood have this effect on you? I planted another kiss a few inches over. There’s nothing wrong with you, though. Whatever we find out, it makes you who you are; it’s not an illness to treat or fix. But, I didn’t want to make you sick, or kill you, because of it.

  I rubbed his shoulder to get his attention; it was so loud he’d have to look at me to understand anything I said. “Time to go home.”

  I avoided walking back through the building – it would take longer to push through everyone and I’d hardly cleaned him up. There was a small chain link gate that we were able to get through just by lifting the latch. Closer to the front of the building was a second gate – sturdier, metal – with a chain and lock holding it shut. I gripped the lock tightly and gave it a hard, quick tug. It was a weaker metal than the chain and snapped first. The chain itself was actually quite nice, there were a few different ways it could be useful... But, I dropped it, for now; I’d be back and, if the chain was still where I left it, I’d grab it then.

  Michael’s hand was on my back the entire way, so I knew he was still there without having to glance back. Having deafened myself, I couldn’t hear him. The ground vibrated from the music and hundreds of moving bodies so I couldn’t feel his footsteps, either.

  Before we started our jog home, I glanced at my phone, both for the time and any messages about pressing issues. One from The Doctor to confirm he’d grabbed the samples. Another from Robbie to say tonight was decent at Jonestown – I’d take decent over having to help sort out employee drama or help bounce drunken brawls – and he wanted to talk to me about the new hire at Just Passin’ Thru when I had time. Any night but Wednesday or Thursday, apparently. Is it the homeless guy that I caught taking a piss? At least it didn’t sound urgent.

  Michael’s hand suddenly left my back and I turned around. He was also turning to look behind him; something caused him to lose his balance and he couldn’t catch himself before he fell back against me. A man was standing about twenty feet away and stared intently at us. “Who’s this?”

  I already suspected who it could be, or at least who might have sent him. If they’d already exchanged words, I didn’t hear them. I restored my hearing; the music was as much of an assault on the ears as I expected it to be, but I worked quickly to filter the sounds around me.

  “-message, you fuckin’ prick!” I caught the end of the sentence. If he meant Willie, this was definitely P. “Can’t handle him unless you’ve drugged him?”

  I can show you how well I handle him.

  “Did he get too vicious for you? Try to kill ya one too many times?”

  Michael, vicious? I chuckled at the thought; all considered he was one of the most passive people I’d met.

  “What’d you give him this time? E?”

  And Ketamine. For what was probably his first time, he was handling it very well. “Among other things.”

  The air was cooler but steam rose from his skin in his rage. P probably had more muscle than I did – he looked like he knew his way around a gym. If they do the type of work I suspect, which seems correct the more I learn, P must be some type of enforcer. How do he and Michael work together?

  “Let’s go somewhere a little quieter to talk, P.”

  He didn’t seem too surprised I knew who he was. “Nah, here’s fine.”

  Could they be related? They have nearly the same attitude, like brothers. P is just louder about it.

  “Go home, P. I’ll be okay.”

  A shared home? Michael seemed disgusted when I suggested the possibility of there being something romantic between them. If not brothers, roommates? And if not roommates, what? A militia? A cult?

  “Have you looked in a fuckin’ mirror? You’re not okay now, M! I’m taking you with me!”

  He calls Michael M. How did it take me this long to figure out that P was the voice on the other end of the call when Michael fell unconscious in his car? He pulled a gun from a hidden holster and pointed it our way. It was hard to tell at this distance, but it seemed to be aimed right at my head.

  “Don’t!” Michael tried to make himself bigger and use his body to shield mine. “Leave while you still can.” I pulled him in closer and watched P.

  “You– you’re protecting him, M?”

  Oh, how amusing. The thought that I’d need protecting in this situation. Or that Michael would protect me. Is that what you expect of him? I knew that – if he thought he could get away – Michael would let P shoot me.

  “He’s protecting you.” Because if you shoot me, I don’t know what I’ll do. Michael doesn’t want me to kill you but that’s definitely on the table tonight. For now, I want to know what you’re gonna do.

  “Lower the gun, P, you don’t know w-!”

  I muffled the rest of his sentence. “Let him make his own decisions. He’s a big boy.” And there’s still time for us to play.

  “Let M go and we’ll forget about this, no trouble.”

  Oh good, you don't know anything about me. “Oh, I love trouble.” Causing it. Punishing Michael for causing it.

  “Did C hire him?”

  I should’ve kept my hand over Michael’s mouth, but now I was curious: C? This question seemed to offend P – he looked at me in growing disgust, then back at Michael.

  “Is that what this guy’s been tellin’ ya?”

  Wasn’t me, I don’t know where he got that idea either.

  “Why am I here?”

  Yes, P, why do you think he’s here? If he hears a similar answer from someone he trusts, maybe he’ll finally understand what I’ve told him. I want him and he’s mine. No one put me up to this.

  “We still don’t know why he took ya. But… we saw what happened with Beth.”

  Interesting, where are you going with this, P?

  “If that took him ten minutes, I…we… M,” P struggled to get the next words out, “how much info have you given him?”

  Shit. Everyone was so wrong but I could see the threads that led them to their conclusions. I bought their tickets for their trains of thought, I just didn't realize these were the tracks it put them on. It didn’t make sense to any of them that I’d take Michael if it wasn’t somehow related to their job. And the longer I had him, the more it challenged everyone’s trust.

  “M, I don’t got a lotta choices here.”

  “Aim for my head so I don’t have to watch him kill you.”

  Fuck. P moved quickly but I was faster. I shoved Michael out of the way and took the bullet in my shoulder – it would’ve been his head. He offered Michael death and Michael accepted it immediately. I put all of this in motion. This would usually be amusing, but not when the wrong person got hurt.

  I met P’s eyes and, when I had him, gave him instructions: ?Lower your gun.? Like Elizabeth, he was strong-willed but compliant. I was going to make sure he heard what I had to say. ?Actually, be just as good for me and put your gun to your head, instead. Keep it there ‘til I tell ya you can move it.?

  While he adjusted his stance, I picked Michael up from the ground. He was now safe but I stood in front of him all the same, just in case. If he and P are related, their genetics could be similar. He’s responding to my compulsion now, but can he break free of it?

  P realized he wasn’t able to move his arm and started stepping toward us. How’d you fuckin’-!” His fist was clenched – he was ready to go hands-on, even one-handed.

  He was a few feet away by the time I was able to grab him again. That was close. If I had to physically intercept P, I’m not sure how far I’d go after first contact. ?Stop where you are and listen.? This didn’t prevent him from talking, but listening to me would be prioritized if my instructions took hold. “He’s in control of everything he says and does around me.” Mostly. He knows the things he says and does might come at a price, but he’s still free to make those decisions. “I can’t do this to Michael, it doesn’t work. Before Elizabeth told me his name, I thought it was Marcus. Willie let me know that a P existed. Michael never told me your name or anything else about you, and, until five minutes ago, I didn’t know there was a C.”

  Michael pulled my shirt up on the side I was shot. Are you checking on me? Concerned about me?

  P’s stare moved behind me, to Michael: “Why’d ya leave with him, then? Why stay?”

  Do you think I gave him a choice? Do you really think, even after meeting me, that Michael still should have been able to fight me and get away? “Do you know him at all? He was gonna come home with me one way or another. He walked out with me so no one else got hurt.” Like anyone that got in the way of me bringing him home.

  “Hard to say why he stays. Could be the lesson he learned that night.” And the rest of that next day. “Or because he knows I’ll find him wherever he goes.” I have all the time in the world. “Maybe he stays because he finally accepts that he’s mine. But mostly, I think he stays to protect you. Because if he leaves again, he knows who I’ll go to first.” Elizabeth means nothing to me beyond being someone Michael cares about. “He’s been protecting you this entire time and you almost blew his brains out.”

  P’s expression changed during the time that I spoke – angry, at first, then horrified. “Aw, shit, Mikey…”

  “Whatever he’s protecting, you don’t have to worry.” That’s never been something I was interested in beyond knowing how it shapes who he is. “I don’t care about what you do or who you work for. I care about him. Tell ‘C,’ if that’s who’s in charge, whatever version of this you have to. He hasn’t betrayed anything. But, he belongs to me now. If I see you again, I’ll gladly give C the same message I gave you.” I didn’t have another crowbar but I could still get creative. I met his eyes again. ?Before we leave, what’s your name, P??

  “...Paul.” Was Elizabeth ‘E’? And then C would be another C name. Clarence Reed, if that wasn’t another alias? That’s obscenely simple. Does the entire alphabet work there?

  “Can’t say it was nice to meet you, Paul. ?Put the gun away, then you’re free to leave.? But will you? “I recommend you go home, but what you do next is up to you.” I haven’t had a good fight in a while.

  “You started all of this, ya piece of shit.”

  Let’s go, then.

  “Tell C I’m dead.”

  Or… not? I glanced back at Michael who was leaning against my other arm, the one that hadn’t been shot. His statement surprised me as much as it did Paul.

  “That’s it? You’re givin’ up?”

  “If I were C, I wouldn’t believe me. He’ll want an explanation that I don’t have for him.”

  “Then it’s a good thing you’re not C, ya paranoid idiot.”

  Does Michael have a history of paranoia? They stared at each other quietly for a moment.

  “Your life isn’t worth two or three weeks of mine. You had no choice but to kill me.” Michael’s weight lifted from my arm and he started to walk off. “The details are your problem.”

  What do you expect to happen in about two weeks?

  “No ‘good-bye?!’”

  Is Paul now giving up? I joined Michael and reached for his hand.

  “You already said it when you took a shot at my head. I’m dead, I can’t say good-bye.”

  “Do you accept cash tips?”

  “Of course, that’s kind of you!” a middle-aged man looked at Michael and me in the rear view.

  “I’m sitting on my wallet so I’ll grab it when I get out. You’ve been great, David.”

  David pulled up to the usual driveway. Once we were out of the car, I leaned forward at the driver’s window and handed him several folded bills. I compelled him to turn his cameras off and step out of the car, to be quiet and still for me.

  Between sharing with Michael earlier, using this same compulsion on Paul, and getting shot, I had to take precautions or I’d bite Michael first thing tomorrow night. Especially if you bite me. I always wanted him, but The Hunger made it harder to resist. I didn’t take an unsafe amount from the driver – he still had a job to do tonight. I said what I needed to before I sent him off with the promised tip and we made the short walk home.

  Michael, or M as Paul called him, went to shower as soon as we got in. The party was still going at full volume in the distance, but in this apartment it was just him and me. I checked my phone once more, replied to a message, then locked it away. I undressed in the living room and slowly snuck into the bathroom. Instead of tossing them in like I usually did, I gently placed my clothes in the hamper.

  I could see Michael’s figure through the curtain and carefully stepped in behind him. I quickly wrapped my arms around him but he didn’t startle. Did you hear me? See me? I reluctantly let go, there’d be more of this after the shower. Michael left as quickly as he could and I didn’t take long. He waited for me near the door, the towel wrapped around his waist. “We’re gonna talk before the night ends,” I informed him.

  He appeared annoyed. I couldn’t blame him, it’d already been a long night. “Can we talk while wearing clothes?”

  How generous do you think I am? You have to earn them. “No. I’ll give you something to wear after, and what I pick out for you will be determined by how this chat goes.” Be a brat. I relieved him of the towel and guided him out of the bathroom.

  “Where am I sitting?”

  I love that question. I was torn between rewarding M for asking or keeping him close anyway. But, I needed him against me. I scooped him up and laid him over me as we sat together in the chair. I let his butt sink between my legs and angled him just enough that I could see his face while we chatted – he could be difficult to read and I needed the full picture.

  “Where else? If I’m sitting down, this is where you sit.” I should start enforcing it if you don’t.

  “We’ll see.”

  So quick with the attitude. My hand was already on his thigh; I lifted it and brought it down hard. He tensed for a moment but otherwise didn’t react. “You’ll see.” I’m definitely enforcing it.

  Some of today’s smells were still trapped in his hair – it was so thick that it was almost unavoidable. His skin was back to smelling like him, the lavender coming through stronger than usual. I took a moment to breathe him in, the peace his scent brought me disrupted by the memory of how fast Paul had been to pull the trigger, how casually Michael gave him the command. How quickly I almost lost you. “You almost died today.”

  “Isn’t that the goal?”

  I wish teasing you about your life wasn’t so entertaining. There’s a real risk that I will go too far and kill you one day, but I don’t want to lose you. “Only if I’m the one killing you.” Even after how things played out with Paul, I couldn’t help myself. “And only when I’m ready. I already know you tried to get me to kill you the night you had the panic attack.”

  “I was still coming down from the disappointment that I wasn’t having a heart attack.”

  I think you actually meant that. “I’m usually amused when I don’t know if you’re being sarcastic or serious, but this isn’t one of those times.” You don’t get to decide when you die.

  We were both becoming tense. “Given all you’ve put me through, why would I think anything you say to me is more than manipulation meant to keep me compliant until you’re done with me?”

  “You’re so quiet that I didn’t realize exactly where your mind was these days. But, as I’ve told you before, I’ve never lied to you, Michael.” Lying to you would be boring.

  “Can you understand why I wouldn’t believe that? I could’ve told them everything I thought I knew about you when I escaped. So, why would I think you'd risk saying anything that could hurt you if I escape again?”

  You could have, but you didn’t. You kept my secrets the entire time you were there. Why do you think that is? “Yes, why would I? I meant what I said earlier. What we have going on may not be conventional, but I care about you.” And I think you care about me, too.

  “Is this how you show people you care?”

  I gave M’s leg another solid smack. “This?” I knew it wasn’t what he meant. “I wouldn’t know, I can’t remember the last time I felt this way about someone.” But I’ll be more forthcoming about what I know if you start doing the same. Such as… “You asked Paul if C hired me? Hired me to do what, exactly?” Paul called him a ‘paranoid idiot,’ like this had happened before.

  He hesitated to respond, but I did get an answer: “I thought they sent you to break me. About what? Your guess would be as good as mine.”

  Is some of your stubbornness just loyalty? You don’t trust me, you lost trust in your own people…

  “There’s nothing I wouldn’t have told them if I had the answer. And if it wasn’t C that hired you, I thought you might work for someone from the job I was on, or a completed one.”

  “I came to break you all on my own.” And I’m not done, yet. Are you disappointed or relieved by the truth? I saw what I wanted and took it. You’re lucky I haven’t taken everything I want. Yet.

  I glanced down at Michael’s shoulder. – the bite I gave him earlier broke skin but was already mostly healed. I can give you a better, deeper bite now that we’re home. Make you, for a moment, bleed as freely as the man we drank from together. Take you to bed with red down your pale neck and chest.

  I leaned in closer to his neck but managed to stop myself before I followed through. M was surprisingly calm after today’s events – annoyed and a little angry, nothing out of the ordinary for him, but . If you feel bad about joining me tonight, you’re doing so well to hide it. Paul said you’re vicious, a killer. Was he trying to make it seem like a risk for me to keep you longer, or is there actually something to it? “Paul said something interesting. He seemed certain you’ve tried to kill me already. So, is killing people a habit of yours?”

  He tensed again, but it didn’t answer my question either way. It could be that he was a trained killer – he knew exactly how to use that knife on me when he thought I was human. Or, maybe my reminder made him feel guilty.

  “Are you asking about my body count?”

  That’s not guilt. I lifted my hand again and brought my palm back down over the same area.

  “Do I have to worry about you?” Is the mask you wear more layered than I realized?

  “I’ll kill you the first chance I get.” There wasn’t even a hint of sarcasm in M’s voice.

  Mmm.. do you think about killing me as much as I think about killing you? “You’ve had many chances already, haven’t you?” I could kill you now in so many fun different ways without either of us getting up.

  “I want to be sure you actually die.”

  “Good thing you haven’t learned any of my weaknesses, yet.” I’m dangerous for him. “Though, I know some of yours.” Equally, I want his danger, want him. “I fantasize about how I’m going to kill you.” My lips found his neck again – it was hard to keep them separate for long. “You’ve earned something quick but I don’t like that ending for either of us.” I’ll make your final moments last, indulge in your suffering. “I like to imagine what you’d look like while I’m doing it and when I’m done. Your body has been my canvas since I brought you home; nothing’s been more visually captivating to me than you after I’ve finished my latest work.” I want my marks all over you. Inside you.

  I pulled him closer to me, needed to feel him. My mouth is so close to his neck, I could just… Control yourself. Not yet… I gave his thigh a rough squeeze, instead, as I took in a deep breath. Why is your scent so strong tonight? “I think about what you’ll smell like in that moment.” Just like this. “And if the certainty of your death will carry a different taste.” I nipped at his shoulders with my teeth – I wanted to use my fangs, sink them into his neck. There’s still time to fuck before bed, isn’t there? You’ve gotten me so hard.

  “I knew what I was doing this time but I couldn’t stop myself.”

  Fuck. I didn’t wanna stop myself right now. But he might not be willing to talk about this later if I didn’t let him get it out. I tried to collect myself before I spoke: “What was it like to be you in that moment?”

  “It was like the night Paul’s guy came to the apartment.”

  In what way?

  “I was hungry but this time I knew what I wanted. More than a craving.”

  A need?

  “I needed his blood.”

  The Hunger. You didn’t complain about the taste. It should taste vile to you. And it should make you sick. Does you have my hunger?

  “Any nausea or cramping?” I placed my hand on Michael’s stomach; it didn’t feel hard or tight, he didn’t seem uncomfortable, there were no weird sounds coming from his bowels. Would you tell me if you were feeling bad, or would you try to hide it from me?

  “No, Doctor.”

  His thigh was bright red where I’d smacked him so I easily rediscovered my target. I could tell it stung this time from his sharp inhale. Mmm, I want you to make that noise for me again. I was tempted, but it was getting late and I needed to make sure he’d do okay through the day.

  “Your body doesn’t process blood the way mine does.” Does it? I will genuinely be surprised if he doesn’t get sick; for him, the blood should almost be like drinking sea water. “So, let’s get some actual nutrition in your system and hope you keep everything down.”

  I threw together something quick and light, something that would be easy on a stomach. “I’m glad you joined me,” I said, as I watched him eat. I wish I knew as it was happening. “Feeding on someone together like that is intimate.” Michael scrunched his face up as he ate. Was it the word ‘intimate?’ “I want to have so many more moments like that with you.”